It’s also why lesbian sex can go on and on and on for actual hours (with breaks of course)
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AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 5 days agoMen tend to get sleepy after sex, whereas women are more likely to become more alert and/or mentally stimulated. I think it’s prolactin release that makes men sleepy, though I’m unsure of the potential mechanism behind women becoming more awake.
If you haven’t shared with your partner/wife that this is off-putting for you, you should tell her. I think it would be reasonable to say that whilst you understand that questions like this are likely how your partner/wife decompresses after sex, that you would appreciate 5-10 minutes of quiet so that you’re able to recuperate also
NeonNight@lemmy.world 5 days ago
AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 5 days ago
I think there’s more to it than this. In my experience, sapphic sex is less focussed around orgasm, which means there’s often periods where the sex/making out is sort of enjoying the good vibes (no pun intended).
In contrast, men that I have slept with can become overly fixated on the idea of me orgasming, which always annoys me because I’m quite difficult to bring to orgasm, and they don’t seem to get that orgasm != good sex (they’re certainly correlated ofc, but one doesn’t necessarily mean the other).
Women also tend to take much longer to reach orgasm, which can mean that sapphic sex tends to be quite dynamic in terms of positions, tempo, use of toys etc… Like, if I’m going down on a partner who can only orgasm through oral sex, and I know that the position I’m in will start causing me pain before she’s anywhere near orgasming, then I might opt to switch things up to be in a position that’s restful for me (so I can resume oral afterwards) but still stimulating for my partner.
TL;DR: I think the biochemical wakefulness can’t hurt, but I think sapphic sex going on for hours is mostly sociocultural
Anivia@feddit.org 5 days ago
Hetero sex can too
AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 5 days ago
It certainly can, but it’s far from typical. Whereas it’s not uncommon for lesbian/sapphic sex to last for hours, such that I’m pretty confident that the average duration of sapphic sex is going to be much higher than the average duration of heterosexual sex
CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world 5 days ago
Because women’s main sex organ is our brains so when our brains get stimulated they tend to perk up
boonhet@sopuli.xyz 4 days ago
So is men’s but most of us never realise it. But the ejaculation just… Kills everything. Apparently not the orgasm if you can separate that from the ejaculation, which I only recently found out is possible.
Once I ejaculate, the body often goes “job done, evolutionary purpose fulfilled, nighty night”. I’d honestly prefer simply laying in bed with my partner and cuddling afterwards, but generally a shower is in order (and for the partner it’s pretty much mandatory anyway).