Comment on Interesting observation
shalafi@lemmy.world 1 day agoWoman to woman is not nearly as threatening, this isn’t in the same ballpark emotionally.
oh hell yea. Multi line edit doubling down on the downvotes.
I mean, at first, everyone just thought you were just a little wrong/redflaggy. But now, definitely, everyone is going to read that edit and think “hmmm this seems like a reasonable and respectable person that I should take seriously”. lmao.
Lmao the edit that’s longer than the original comment
I just want to point out that saying something has the same energy doesn’t imply that it is the same thing in intensity. In fact, often we are hyperbolic to highlight the kind of energy that we are talking about.
The reason why you are getting down voted is also not because of your opinion that these things are different, in intensity or whatever, but because it feels like you really want to make that difference. Why do you care so much about that difference? Why are you defending bad behaviour from being compared to other bad behaviour? Why do you care? Most of people that you called autistic (in a prejorative manner), understand that as you trying to justify that behavior, and the answer to the question of “why would they” is that they understand you as such a person. A person who is acting in a way and is trying to excuse it.
Of course, I don’t claim such a thing but I thought, I would help you to understand this social event in your life, as these can be difficult to understand for some people, e.g. autistic people. I am proud of all the autistic people in this community who understood this interaction, good job! I know it might wasn’t easy for you.
Not directly related to the original comment, but generally, I must disagree with the assertion that caring about differences in intensity is problematic or warrants the assumption of “justifying bad behavior”. I’d argue, that in most cases, failure to juxtapose two distal scenarios is dubious and spurs a breakdown in communication. It seems commonplace now, amongst a set of the population, to cast all loosely related things into one bucket, details be damned. This is a dangerous mode of groupthink. It represents an over-correction that pushes the pendulum-of-social-discord to new heights. I also think it emblematic of the current political divide. Assuming intent, and classifying it as akin to some greater evil, only “highlights” that one party is leaning upon emotional hooks to make an obscure point seem clear. That’s religious bollocks. Words matter and differences are important. Good-bad binaries are born from our ideological past, preparing us to go to battle.
“why are you defending bad behavior from being compared”
He quite clearly is comparing them and saying one isn’t as bad, in his tongue-in-cheek opinion.
“why do you care?”
Many are quite simply fatigued with the torrent of false equivalencies plaguing modern discourse, whether for dramatic effect or not. I think it sometimes comes from a good place, but more often, I suspect it to be self-serving group selection, othering behavior. The sanctimony with which some connect the dots clouds broader context. Effective communication requires giving the other party some grace.
I speak to some folks who have worked on university campuses over the past 20 years. Beginning, in earnest, around ~2010, this type of behavior has run amok. I do think it started with good, well-reasoned intentions but metastasized into a nebulous search-for-meaning, a weary reaction to the declining state-of-the-world. Yes, identifying bad behavior can be a positive, to move society away from our more basal instincts, but oversimplifying in this manner is not helpful; it’s inflammatory. It’s like fighting fire with fire, which may work for a time, but ultimately, it’s a stopgap, feel-good, short-term solution that runs the risk of exacerbating the original problem.
Fact of the matter is, we are living during a time of extinction. Siloing into groups is probably inevitable, and I think manifestations of the culture war are a symptom, driven by environmental factors and bad actors. But, humans should be intelligent enough to maintain a broad context window and resist the temptation to reduce the complexities of cause-and-effect into emotional binaries. Mapping differences is how we truly improve and avoid thinking in binaries.
TLDR: I drank some coffee and wrote some stuff. No offense intended. For more about “thinking in binaries” check out the essays of Montaigne.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 day ago
As a lesbian, yeah nah. Sure men are much more likely to be able to overpower me, but I’ve been sexually violated by women. And regardless it’s creep shit to insist upon someone who doesn’t want tou
shalafi@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I’m only pointing out that the threat level isn’t even close. Are you saying it is? Of course you’re not, but FFS it’s not in the same ballpark.
If I came on you and said I could “straighten” you out with my penis, that’s a threat (at least it is in my book). If a lesbian approaches another woman and says, WHATEVER THE FUCK SHE SAYS. Are we going to pretend these two situations are even close?!
No wonder kids don’t get laid until they’re 28, everyone afraid of making a comment that gets taken wrong. I cannot imagine how many times I missed out by not wanting to be “that guy”. Many women later chastised me for not being more forward!
BTW, the original post is a “joke”.
ronl2k@lemmy.world 1 day ago
How odd that one paragraph later you’re criticizing others for not being able to recognize a joke.