In other news, more and more drugged up SUV drivers seek vengeance by running over innocent gas station bystanders… most of the time it turns out to be just a cat, so it’s okay.
how is this a shitpost and not just, y’know, horrifying?
In other news at a gas station near by...
Submitted 1 month ago by werefreeatlast@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/88e68189-c05d-4e33-b7e2-dd302a2fb6cf.png
Comments
juliebean@lemm.ee 1 month ago
werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Because I added extrapolated news about revenge that never was.
werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 month ago
As a commentary on the daily “Florida man” level of weird shit that happens in Seattle, shooting a guy for getting drugged at your establishment is getting the the purge line. So here I propose that the level be escalated. Couldn’t a well drugged fella find revenge for his compatriot who’s been wrongfully ended by a shop keeper? But the sarcasm brings the reader to reality when the drugged guy can’t even get revenge by attacking the closest thing to the enemy he could find. Instead, the cat gets a good 8 inches shorter and distributes it’s inner contents on the owner’s driveway.
One could end the commentary here, but I suppose there is a million other ways the situation could escalate. Like maybe 🤔 migrants who might be homeless start getting tragedies at random. And maybe that shifts over to just normal people who look like homeless migrants…blah blah…this just in! Super model dressed in homeless migrant fashion gets KO’d by gas station owner. It turns out she was just gonna pay for a Twinkie. Just like that, Seattle gets 0.00001% weirder.
Fortatech@gregtech.eu 1 month ago
Running over a cat is OKAY!?!?
werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Yeah it’s just a cat. Probably their 🐈 cat. So it’s okay 👍. If they can hide it quickly.
/Sarcasm 🙄.
HollowNaught@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Americans, is everything alright over there?
werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 month ago
The cat? 😺. Nah. Everything got run over.
the_toast_is_gone@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Here’s the article. According to the story, there were two people panhandling and using drugs; they were asked to leave. One threw a rock at the employee’s car window, shattering it, and then threatened to shoot him. The video also says the person was shot because he lunged at the employee. I hope the truth comes out and the situation is handled appropriately.
werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 month ago
It’s a shit post, not news. If you ignore the details and focus on the headline things looks worse. Now imagine yourself living in a city where a guy shoots another guy just because the other guy is drugging himself. I’m sure nothing would have happened for example if the druggie wasn’t bothered…but then why isn’t he doing that elsewhere at his home? Because probably he doesn’t have one! Or maybe he got kicked out of his because of the drug problem? Or worse, he’s got a home but want his family and kids to see his addiction. See. Keep asking why. Why is he addicted? Because he was able to get drugs. Why? …is it because the Chinese are sending drugs thru Mexico or Canada? Or maybe there’s an evil axis of people who want drugs in Seattle such that less people are attracted to the city and maybe they can afford it again? Or maybe they want to buy the entire city so this is just to scare the remaining owners of homes and shops there? That’s how it happened in San Diego. It used to be a drug shithole, then suddenly people started buying up property, you know, to help. And that cleaned up the city, for a while. Then now it’s a shithole again.