the_toast_is_gone
@the_toast_is_gone@lemmy.world
- Comment on I transitioned to become a boy. Now I'm suing those who encouraged me 1 day ago:
This article poses the question explicitly, and here is another woman suing her healthcare providers for using this argument. The query
“Would you rather have a living” “or a dead”has hundreds of results on Google and the article mentions people saying this to her family. - Comment on I transitioned to become a boy. Now I'm suing those who encouraged me 2 days ago:
Most trans kids are suicidal or practicing self harm already which is exactly why doctors say this.
No doctor will ever tell you this unless your kid is at risk of self harm or death, already.
First off, it isn’t just doctors who say this. People on the streets or on social media shout down friends and family with hostage situation language like this. This also sets up vulnerable people to say it to those who disagree with it, or even worse, reframes suicide as an acceptable response if their friends and family argue against the treatment.
Second, someone should never tell someone else, “you are going to kill yourself unless you do what I tell you.” This goes double when the other person is already in a vulnerable state, and quadruple when the person saying this is in a position of authority. People often kill themselves because they believe there are no other options, and telling them that only cements the “no way out” problem in their minds.
Third, we often tell people who are suicidal not to seek out permanent solutions to temporary problems - like committing suicide because of current mental troubles or life problems. Telling an at-risk individual to get medications and surgeries that irreversibly change their body is a clear-cut case of a permanent solution to a temporary problem. The woman in the article is so distraught by her double masectomy she felt pressured to get that she’s now suing the people who convinced her to go through with it. Even if this only happens to a minority of people, we shouldn’t accept situations like this as “acceptable losses” or anything of the sort.
Fourth, if someone is at serious risk of ending their life, they should be in the emergency room, not arguing over medical procedures with their parents. That’s an extremely volatile situation and hanging the threat over parents’ heads of finding their child’s corpse is a severely wrong approach.
Would you tell someone with severe depression “you will kill yourself if you don’t take SSRIs and get X surgery”? Would you say the same about stimulants to someone with ADHD? Or about antipsychotics to people with bipolar or schizophrenia? Is it acceptable for someone to threaten suicide to maintain a romantic/friendly relationship with someone who doesn’t want it anymore?
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 2 days ago:
I generally agree with you that the system as it is doesn’t work, and I’m grateful you’ve shared these points. I’m sorry to leave it here, but I recently developed a problem with my hands that makes typing on my phone difficult; that last message was a struggle. Thank you for the calm and rational discussion, and I hope that civil conversations like this become the norm.
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 2 days ago:
It seems like we’re more or less in agreement on the first point. There’s just too much money in keeping the status quo right now. I’ll leave it at that.
I am a bit dubious of several of your claims
Here’s a few sources for you. The sources for migrant aid are specific to New York City.
- The backlog of asylum cases is over six years long.
- The migrant influx is so severe that NYC has declared a state of emergency.
- Migrants are being given prepaid debit cards and placed in hotels at the city’s expense.
- The city temporarily shut down a school to use it as a migrant shelter. Given the severity of the storm they mentioned, I can understand their need, but there are plenty of vacant commercial properties they could have used instead.
- Migrants are given food stamps.
- Migrants are given low-cost insurance regardless of their legal status.
- Migrant children are placed in public schools.
- The city has housed more migrants than homeless New Yorkers.
- Partly as a result of the migrant influx, there is a much higher budget deficit in NYC than before.
I don’t think the county should import so many people who will become such a burden on our welfare infrastructure when we’re already struggling to take care of our own people.
What’s the fastest way to get rid of illegal immigrants? Making them citizens.
That may be true. Granting it though, is it the best approach? Sure, I believe some leniency should be given to people who have been here for years, like those who were brought here as children and have since grown up. But like the current asylum system, that could create precedent for migrants to enter the country illicitly and get forgiveness easier than they could have gotten permission. Expanding visas and streamlining the process for green cards and citizenship is on the table for sure. But in my opinion, applicants should have to wait in their home countries before entering, and stricter scrutiny should be applied to asylum cases.
Getting a massive influx of people all at once would certainly cause disruptions (though, again, at least as many as mass deportations), but getting tons of new taxpayers who buy into the whole system makes a lot more sense to me than using them as cheap labor.
That makes more sense to me as well, but we already have that influx and it’s already causing problems throughout the country. If we start giving blanket amnesty, then this will encourage others to do the same later down the line. It isn’t sustainable.
I can sort of agree that Americans are being harmed, insofar as government services are being strained, but the fix there is to strengthen said systems so they operate efficiently
There’s only so much that increased efficiency can do with a spike like this. It’s severely dysfunctional at this point, not only because of the influx but also because of the poor allocation of government resources. I’d love for everyone to get the help they need, but we have a huge problem even without the migrant crisis.
- Comment on I transitioned to become a boy. Now I'm suing those who encouraged me 2 days ago:
I think this is an extremely important question. Trans people’s suffering is no doubt real, but dilemmas are posed by medical professionals and activists like “Would you rather have a dead daughter or a living son?” These set up emotional and medical hostage situations with immense pressure on patients to begin treatment they may not have wanted and parents to go along with it.
The medical industry has a great incentive to do this because it creates a pipeline for people to become lifetime customers for medications and other therapies. We already know that, in the US, dialysis centers game the Medicare system by giving less effective treatments because they have a captive market and make more money with this approach. People who go through transitions will need medical treatments for the rest of their lives, both to primarily maintain their new bodies and to deal with the side effects of their primary therapies. Again, a captive market, but this time created through inappropriate emotional pressure.
It’s a sad situation. People who question their gender identity absolutely should be taken seriously and helped through their struggles, just like anyone else with significant physical, mental, or emotional challenges. The threat to their mental health is important. But is telling these patients that they will commit suicide if they don’t begin gender-affirming care the best approach? Or is it a self-fulfilling prophecy? I hope we can explore the topic more.
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 2 days ago:
It isn’t, but it’s one of the systemic issues that makes illegal immigration as prevalent as it is. If the law against employing illegal immigrants was strictly enforced, there would be little incentive to continue using them. Then there would be less incentive to illegally immigrate (no job opportunities so no money getting sent back to family, for example).
To your point, a larger problem to the average person is the resources that are spent on them, and on asylum seekers whose treatment was changed significantly under Biden. There’s now a six-year wait time before an asylum case can be heard in court, and as long as they applied for it before they entered the country, they’re allowed to stay that whole time. Major cities have been swamped with migrants as a result of not just this policy, but also the governor of Texas bussing them to sanctuary cities. They’ve been given priority treatment in these places instead of homeless citizens who need help just as much as them - schools have been closed and students shifted to online learning to house migrants, for example. Migrants are given financial aid in the form of food stamps or even prepaid debit cards. On top of that, their children are placed in American schools and given healthcare. I strongly doubt that the government is making more money on sales tax from migrants than it is spending on their welfare. This isn’t an indictment of the migrants themselves needing help, it’s just a criticism of where our elected officials place their priorities.
I support reforming the legal immigration process. I have numerous friends from foreign countries who have a great interest in moving here, but because of things like the H1b lottery system, it’s next to impossible even if you’re highly qualified. Still, that’s no excuse for opening the doors to people who sidestep that whole affair and get more assistance from the government than legal immigrants do.
The American people are being harmed by the massive influx of migrants. The longer this goes on, the worse it will get. Should a country put the needs of its own citizens before other countries’, or the other way around?
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 3 days ago:
A big problem, from what I can tell, is that there’s a massive backlog of asylum cases and the asylum seekers are allowed to remain in the country until they’re tried. The estimated wait time at this point is 6 years. Meanwhile, the various legal processes for permanent residence are years long and they have a million strings attached. Some of the legal routes don’t even allow you to be in the country until you’re approved. That’s one of the reasons Hispanic voters turned out for Trump - they felt as though people taking this backdoor route were cheating the system and giving them a bad name.
I can understand a grace period for people who have already been here for some time, but we’ve already given incredible amnesty. How many more times will we push out the deadline, as it were?
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 3 days ago:
The problem is that the agricultural industry basically has a slave caste as its backbone. There will be no lasting solution as long as that’s true. Dismantling that system was good for America back in the 1800s, and it would be good if it happened again today.
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 3 days ago:
My mistake, I’ll edit the comment. The figure is 6 in 10 registered voters. Numbers vary depending on how it’s phrased.
- Comment on CNBC Shock Poll: 73% of Americans Now Support Militarizing the Border 3 days ago:
Nearly 3/4 of Americans support deporting all illegal immigrants. After the reform of the asylum process, people are pretty angry.
- Comment on Why can't someone create a public alternative to health insurance in the USA? 1 week ago:
I’d love to see insurance companies get taken down a notch, but what you’re saying isn’t nearly as simple as you think. People regularly get tens of thousands of dollars into debt for lifesaving care, even with insurance. Those without it can go hundreds of thousands or even millions in the hole - I’ve personally known people in that situation. I certainly agree that hospitals are partly to blame, but the whole healthcare system is built around insurance paying most of the cost. This never would have happened if insurance didn’t exist. It’s a captive market. The only way doctors, hospitals, and pharmacists would unite in not accepting insurance was if all insurance companies disappeared. There’s just too much money on the table otherwise.
- Comment on Why can't someone create a public alternative to health insurance in the USA? 1 week ago:
Very true. There’s some benefit where the business can get a “package deal” of sorts which makes it cheaper than buying individual policies, but it’s still a shell game.
- Comment on Why can't someone create a public alternative to health insurance in the USA? 1 week ago:
Insurance companies make money by indirectly extorting customers, be they individuals or businesses, through pricing schemes with healthcare providers. The American healthcare system is designed and priced around people having insurance, as you’ve noticed. This leads to insanely high bills for what should be simple things. An ambulance ride often costs over $1,000 without insurance, for example. In a nutshell, they’ve created a system where they are both the problem and the solution. Why don’t they start behaving more ethically? Well, from a money standpoint, why would you become less corrupt when you can collect more money by being corrupt?
Changing insurance providers, or even just certain coverage choices, isn’t easy. We have what are called “enrollment periods” in the US when you can do this, and the only other times are under major life changes such as marriage or having a child. As another user noted, most people get insurance through their employer. The company (usually) pays the lion’s share of the premiums; otherwise, the plans would be completely out of reach to employees. My plan would be four times as expensive to me if I was paying for it out of pocket.
As a result, starting something like what you want on a national level would be extraordinarily expensive, hard to compete with established players, and likely legally troublesome. Don’t get me wrong, we need reform pretty badly, but those reasons are why it hasn’t really taken off.
- Comment on Taylor Lorenz Says 'We Want These Executives Dead' Hours After Health Insurance CEO Murdered 2 weeks ago:
You are, but redditors are so strong a stereotype that you have just about every other site gunning against them. Even other redditors hate redditors.
- Comment on Taylor Lorenz Says 'We Want These Executives Dead' Hours After Health Insurance CEO Murdered 2 weeks ago:
Given the levels of alarm that were being raised by the media and politicians across the aisle, I doubt people were too apathic to vote. It’s hard to feel like that when every person on your screens tells you that Trump is a fascist threat to democracy. It’s more likely that so many people sat out because they didn’t like the direction that both parties were taking. Less “I don’t care,” more “I can’t support either side.”
- Comment on Taylor Lorenz Says 'We Want These Executives Dead' Hours After Health Insurance CEO Murdered 2 weeks ago:
I haven’t seen nearly as many right-wing people praising/encouraging obvious murder at I have here and on Bluesky. If something horrible happened to Nancy Pelosi, you sure wouldn’t see me posing with a model of her decapitated head - [unlike a certain comedian.](hollywoodreporter.com/…/kathy-griffin-holds-a-fak…
Even granting what you say, is putting out veiled death threats under one’s real name really the kind of thing leftist figures should be doing in the wake of an election where Trump was nearly killed twice and the US decided that the left is too extreme for them?
- Comment on Daniel Penny prosecutor's 'hypocrisy' revealed 2 weeks ago:
Here’s hoping for a Not Guilty verdict. The facts are on Daniel’s side.
- Comment on Fact 😔💁 2 weeks ago:
Good addictions, though? Set yourself up for success, get a few of those.
- Comment on PRESIDENCY, SENATE, HOUSE, AND POPULAR VOTE!!!!! 1 month ago:
It’s like they took all the wrong lessons from their parents who made them eat their vegetables and yelled at them for dressing inappropriately. And the “Bible-thumping fire-and-brimstone preachers.” And Vance’s silly “childless cat ladies” comment.
If they were pushed away by zealotry, what makes them think it would appeal to anyone else?
- Comment on PRESIDENCY, SENATE, HOUSE, AND POPULAR VOTE!!!!! 1 month ago:
I’m talking about the real deal communists like Antifa and social media addicts - the kinds whose every interaction with their political opponents is hostile because they’re “the oppressors” or “colonists,” instigate fights, burn down cities, loot stores in the chaos, cheer on the recent increased crime and failing businesses because it serves their motives, want to overthrow the government to install a figure who will centrally plan the economy, and lie, cheat, and steal at every opportunity because anything is acceptable as long as it ushers in the glorious revolution that will somehow let them not work at all when all is said and done.
- Comment on [deleted] 1 month ago:
Talking like that could get you arrested, your friends and family detained, and your online communities shut down. Don’t do that to the people you care about.
- Comment on PRESIDENCY, SENATE, HOUSE, AND POPULAR VOTE!!!!! 1 month ago:
And everyone frothing at the mouth to insult anyone who isn’t a die-hard, propaganda-spreading communist has only themselves and their childish behavior to thank for this.
- Comment on Is it okay to take drugs to make yourself a better person? Does it make a difference if "better" is mental or if it's physical? 1 month ago:
Don’t take non-OTC drugs without consulting a physician first. You could really screw yourself up with some of them, the hard stuff especially. The potential ups of doing them aren’t worth the likely losses.
People who take aspirin or ibuprofen take it for a specific purpose, and when they no longer need it, they stop. With things like steroids, heroin, cocaine, and Adderall (if they don’t have specific conditions like ADHD), people frequently end up chasing a horizon that only gets further away the harder they run to catch it. It’s a miserable existence and it causes them, and often their friends and loved ones, endless pain.
You deserve the best from yourself. That includes self-care. You’re more than your flaws and disorders, whatever they may be. Don’t make those an excuse to wreck yourself in pursuit of a goal that probably isn’t real.
- Comment on What's the point of a long-distance friendship? 1 month ago:
The majority of my friends are online. The internet has connected me with people who broaden my horizons, help me learn interesting and important things, and grow as a person. You don’t need to know someone in-person for that to happen anymore. IRL friendships will always be better, all other things being equal, but they’re not the only solution.
- Comment on 7 days to die is no longer Early Access, but still looks like this 1 month ago:
7 Days to Die has a terrible problem with the devs not knowing what they want to do with the game. All they know is that the players are doing it wrong.
- Comment on Are there any historical or modern day true stories (like the story of The Buddha) of someone born rich and privileged who just walked away from their family and turned down money and an inheritance? 1 month ago:
Saint Benedict Joseph Labre followed a similar path. Though he was from a wealthy family, he strove to live a monastic life. When he was turned down twice, he resorted to becoming a homeless pilgrim who traveled between European holy sites until he died of starvation. Notably, though, he was said to avoid people who were too fond of him and practically sought out opportunities to be downtrodden.
- Comment on In other news at a gas station near by... 1 month ago:
Here’s the article. According to the story, there were two people panhandling and using drugs; they were asked to leave. One threw a rock at the employee’s car window, shattering it, and then threatened to shoot him. The video also says the person was shot because he lunged at the employee. I hope the truth comes out and the situation is handled appropriately.
- Comment on What's the term for someone that likes Jesus of Nazareth, but doesn't identify with church, religious dogma, or whatever? 2 months ago:
So what did he do, then? How can you substantiate it?
- Comment on What's the term for someone that likes Jesus of Nazareth, but doesn't identify with church, religious dogma, or whatever? 2 months ago:
Usually when I hear people described as “Christ-like,” it’s used to demote how much power and influence that person has over others - for example, “Donald Trump is a Christ-like figure among the alt-right.” Someone going around and calling themselves that would come across as strange at best.
- Comment on What's the term for someone that likes Jesus of Nazareth, but doesn't identify with church, religious dogma, or whatever? 2 months ago:
paranoid and psychotic tendencies
If he was simply insane, then how would he have performed any of his miracles? Or are you going to throw out the parts of the Bible you don’t like and keep the ones that support your position?
Also, I’ve dealt with, and am friends with, plenty of people with what you would call “paranoid and psychotic tendencies.” That you would accuse someone who walked this earth more than 1,900 years ago of having them suggests you either have supreme medical and historical knowledge. Perhaps you’ve spoken with him so you can make an accurate diagnosis?
in which he claims to be God
If he is, then that explains everything he said and did in the Bible. It’s pretty obvious that if he’s God that he would want people to follow him.
This comes off to me as incredibly paranoid
He was talking about Judas, who was stealing money from the ministry and later sold Jesus out for a handful of silver. Calling that out isn’t paranoia.
I’m apparently not the only one who thought Christ seemed mad
If he was just a madman and the people he was “curing” of “demons” were also madmen, those “cures” wouldn’t have happened. No person with schizophrenia has ever been cured of this disorder simply because another person with schizophrenia touched them. I’ve had the disorder for about seven years at this point; I wish it were that simple.
I agree with you that following Jesus doesn’t make a lot of sense unless you’re worshipping him. His entire message is based on his own divinity. If he was just a prophet, then if he was a good one, he wouldn’t be saying things like “I and the Father are one” (John 10:30).