Comment on How do I tame my frustration toward my aging parents?
RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Aging seems to have a backwards effect. Elderly act more childish the older they get.
So try to think about how frustrated they may have been with you when you were a child. Now its like the roles are reversed. Its up to you to take care of them, to pay them back cor the care they gave you, as it were.
PunnyName@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Or, instead of the progeny taking care of parents, professionals could.
RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Yeah, if they can afford it. Personally, I feel that not taking care of your parents is disrespectful if you have the money and capacity to do so, but there is nothing wrong with paying professionals. But that is pretty expensive in my area.
PunnyName@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Extremely relevant Steve Hoffstetter: youtube.com/shorts/TPb7pd4UnXo?si=sYifsgGWAiYea5M…
Smoogs@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Well you’re either too busy to take care of your parents and so you pay for a professional
Or your too busy to take care of your parents and still can’t afford to.
Pick one.
bobs_monkey@lemm.ee 9 months ago
I’d rather a mix of both. Most affordable homes suck (my mom’s getting there so I’ve been doing some precursory looking), so I’d rather have my mom living with my wife and I and having a nurse (nanny if you will) do the routine functions when that time comes.
manapropos@lemmy.basedcount.com 9 months ago
This is so weird to me. In so many countries outside of the west different generations live with each other and take care of each other. I only think it’s fair for people to give back the same kind of care to their parents they received as kids
the_q@lemmy.world 9 months ago
But children didn’t ask to exist. Parents “choose” to burden themselves with children. The elderly, particularly here in the US, are a drain on nearly every aspect of life. They control most of the wealth, still vote even with decreased mental capacity and empathy and generally sap the bulk of the resources for healthcare services.
manapropos@lemmy.basedcount.com 9 months ago
I hope when you’re old and incapable you’re treated compassionately, however that may be
Smoogs@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Your parents also didn’t ask to exist.
maporita@unilem.org 9 months ago
My wife was horrified to learn that we put our parents in a home when they get old. She’s from Colombia and such a thing would be unthinkable.
Having said that I would never want my children to look after me. It’s not fair on them… they have their own lives to lead.
Smoogs@lemmy.world 9 months ago
probably because where she lived probably doesn’t have the same housing/living wage/ economy crisis where you’re expected to work 14 hours of the day just to struggle to put a roof over your head let alone have absolutely no time to look after someone who is incapable and failing cognitively
Smoogs@lemmy.world 9 months ago
Probably because of housing costs not driving up the need to work for 14 hrs a day in which no, you cannot look after an elderly person who is struggling. That is a full time job. You can’t expect a person already working two full time jobs to also fail at that.