Comment on You have 8 seconds.
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 month agoIt’s a list taken from every complaint I’ve heard from women about being asked out in those places, usually accompanied by general statements about how “it’s never ok to ask a woman out there” or how “all women hate it.” Both IRL and online.
If you’d like to do an experiment, make a post, here or on reddit or some public forum, asking “Women of X, where is it inappropriate to ask a woman on a date?” If every place I listed isn’t mentioned in the thread (without mentioning this experiment, has to be blind) I’ll put my hat in my butt.
Men will tell you “just hit on her at a hobby bro, go to the gym” women will say “hell no I’m here to work out not hook up, we get hit on at the gym constantly it’s exhausting.” By that math it has to be working for some men some times for them to suggest it, but it clearly is also making women uncomfortable.
It’s possible to talk to random women without seeming intimidating. Always leave an easy out. Don’t be pushy. Be casual. The thing people don’t get is they try to just fish for numbers. Sometimes, just a compliment and never talking to her again is what you need.
The real way to meet new people for relationships is to meet new friends. Every person you meet opens a ton of opportunities for experiences and connections.
Jiggle_Physics@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Don’t start talking to them with the intent to ask them out. Just see if you can get their attention, see of you can find a little bit of common ground to build a conversation on, then, if they are receiving you well over the course of your conversation, say something like “hey, I enjoyed talking to you, would you mind meeting up some other time?” or something to that effect. This works best in places for socializing, bars, music venues, hobby spaces, etc. It can be applied to more formal places, just has to happen over a broader period of time, as you get to know your coworkers, or whatever.
The strong vibes of “my intent in talk to you is to have sex” is, often, what makes things uncomfortable. So, even if you can’t find common ground, or the conversation went well and she turns you down, or gives some non-committal answer, and you part ways amicably, you will have not be seen as some creep.