This reminds me so much of a selfish, childish uncle I haveâŚ
ugh
He gets very possessive of certain people in his life, and if they need care, it doesnât matter that heâs not helping, or even actively making things worse⌠only HE gets to be there. HE must supervise and monitor interactions. If you are on the phone too long with one of his people you would hear him starting to demand their attention in the background, increasingly louder, cutting midway into sentences. Of course in the first instance when something bad happens to one of those certain people he makes it all about HIMSELF. Full dramatic breakdown and whimpering and redirecting attention to himself. Heâs like 79 Shockingly in the last 2-3 years has he improved to the point that I can visit my aunt and stay out late without him calling in increasingly short intervals after 6pm. And he is more restrained. It took a severe family tragedy, though. Plus realising how many people who formerly tolerated him were actively avoiding him. Some people are beyond any meaningful change though IMO.
CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone â¨3⊠â¨months⊠ago
I copy and pasted the description of what a Martyr is btw but everything else was mine. Iâve met a few martyrs in my time. They stand out like dogâs balls.
How to deal with a martyr? You canât because they wonât listen. They are more wiser than you.
Seagoon_@aussie.zone â¨3⊠â¨months⊠ago
agree
thing is she denies it was her choice
CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone â¨3⊠â¨months⊠ago
Of course. Thatâs what a Martyr does. I have to. Poor me.
Seagoon_@aussie.zone â¨3⊠â¨months⊠ago
I know I grumble, everyone I know does
but we arenât doing it for sympathy and none of us say poor me
itâs a coping mechanism to grumble
whereas a martyr is manipulating
Is that right?