Comment on Is it reasonable to tell a person you once loved about the fact years later?
Dookieman12@piefed.social 1 day ago
I’ve seen it go both ways. Some reveal feelings they also had. Some are creeped out and let it put a whole different perspective on your whole history together. If you decide to tell them, start by saying that your feelings are in the past and that you don’t expect anything to happen, you just felt you needed to share.
adespoton@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
The problem with sharing now is it comes off as insincere — why, after all this time, is NOW suddenly the time to share?
AskewLord@piefed.social 1 day ago
because you’re stupid and you still cling to this memory as a deep truth, rather than a childish crush.
A lot of folks are like this. They would rather live in a idealized memory and cherish it rather than realize how dumb it is to do that.
adespoton@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
I think I’d remove the “stupid” bit though; a lot of people who live their fantasy life in their head seem to be much happier in general than those of us who hold up such things against a backdrop of critical thinking.
They don’t, however, seem to learn from their mistakes or improve their lot in life, except by accident. But they’re generally quite happy at the expense of the people around them they invariably impact by remembering what never was. Some people will abandon them to their fiction after attempting to help them escape it, but others will enable them, trying to create a semblance of the reality that would never happen naturally. See the US government for a fascinating case study of how this plays out.