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BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

There’s only two of anything if you define broadly enough. There’s only two kinds of people: • those who have passed a kidney stone and those who haven’t • those who currently have a single testicle and those who don’t

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NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
There are two types of people, those who admit they pee in the shower and liars.

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Ceedoestrees@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago
I have a signed document pledging the right testicle of a highschool friend that I technically own and collect upon his death. I don’t know how many testicles I have.

I didn’t make that up for a hypothetical. This is how I live.

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- HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  you and me should be friends. what’s a life without an ambiguous number of body parts?
  
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  - Ceedoestrees@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    Let’s do it, but only if this online friendship doesn’t lead to a chance meetcute where my friend dies the will is contested, and you happen to be the best damn testicle lawyer this side of the Mississippi River.
    
    I’ve already given up on love and nothing will thaw this icy heart. Not even the best damn lawyer this side of the Mississippi River.
    
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    HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    Oh, my brother is the best damn testicle lawyer this side of the Mississipp. I’m just a collector.
    
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HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
does my jar collection count

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