Comment on Sloth Demon
sunflowercowboy@feddit.org 4 days agoIt fills me to the brim to know you can see the way your cup fills at the marvel of our stars, at the patience within your meditation.
Relationships like this can be draining because you wish to compensate or match somehow. So it creates almost a directionless frustration of inadequacy.
It is how I felt when my love would work 2 jobs and I had so much time and couldn’t really do chores because of my upbringing. Making it a threshold I had to cross as an adult.
latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 days ago
Ooh, I wouldn’t consider that a parent-partner type of relationship, sounds like there were some solid reasons for that unbalanced distribution! At least, that’s how I would see it, with the context of my upbringing having left me with several deficiencies in other areas of my psyche. They can be hard thresholds to cross, objectively speaking.
As for the frustration, as I understand it from this context, it was generated not by being coddled/babied., but by wanting and being unable. To me, it all comes down to intent. If a person wants to [something] but they can’t [something] due to stuff like health issues (physical or psychological), then that’s a completely different type of situation, it’s part of those objective incapacitators which I’ve mentioned in my initial comment.
To me, this is perfectly understandable and acceptable as long as it’s clear to me that my partner truly wants to try to rebalance everything. It’s when these types of blockers are constantly being used as an excuse, yet nothing is done to try to get through them that I see as a problem, because it basically means said person isn’t interested in participating from the start.
Either way, I’m sorry you had to go through that… I know how difficult it can be to want to do something, but to not be allowed to do so by our own brain…
sunflowercowboy@feddit.org 3 days ago
Your words are kind and sweet. Thank you.
It does always come down to want as cause for any suffering.
latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 days ago
Fully deserved, from what you’ve shared, and I’d also add a hug, so🤗 I can only imagine the inner pressure all of that bubbling frustration generated…
And, yes, want is always the key, to both good and bad things, unfortunately… Although even so, I’d honestly say that a helluva lot of people could do with more intentionality behind their existing, I’d at least have some respect for some of the crumminess currently spreading around like a fungal infection if it were intentional, but most of it’s simply because some people don’t even look where they’re going, y’know? Feels, like… the most pointless form of a lie, to everyone including oneself, dunno…
sunflowercowboy@feddit.org 2 days ago
Ah, the disconnect from the material actions and the immaterial consequence. Such a place to get lost in. I fear sadly the world is more lost by the people who do act with intentionality. Just not all act with good faith, nor with full conciousness. It is not their fault our inherent society allows such nature to proliferate, it is just sadness from which we must make beauty. i wish the world to know how to pull from the nothing, something more.