Comment on Minor inconvenience
theangryseal@lemmy.world 1 day agoHey hey hey.
She was diagnosed with BPD right at the end of our relationship after I caught her cheating over and over again.
Of course once she done research on BPD I was lying and making it up and she never told me that.
Good lord man. What a nightmare it all was.
lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 1 day ago
BPD meets Pathological Liar
theangryseal@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Man I’m still finding out crazy lies she told on me.
Talked to my sister the other night and we got on the subject, she said, “You were pretty sadistic to her at times, but she was nuts.” I replied, “Sadistic? I wasn’t always kind to her, but sadistic? That’s a stretch.”
“Well, she told me some crazy stuff, like when you stuck a screwdriver in your ear and hit it with a hammer if she didn’t say exactly what you wanted her to say when you thought she was lying once.”
HOLY SHIT!
I said, “Well, I still have my hearing. If there was any truth to that, wouldn’t I be deaf? Like, at least in one ear?”
When I caught her with the guy she ended up with, she swore she was raped. He’s such a great guy too, and I’d never tell him that because it would crush him. He took care of her as she died from cancer.
Man, oh man. The stories I have with that girl. She lied about anything and everything. According to her, I beat her, raped her, was responsible for every failure in her life.
We were about to close on a loan for a home when she left me and I had to back out. She just sabotaged everything constantly. She took our daughter, left, told me her sister’s husband had guns so I’d better not come over to try to get my daughter. I said in anger, “If your plan is to keep my kid from me, he’ll need those guns to stop me from coming to get her.”
Phone calls from her family started coming in. “How dare you threaten to shoot up a house with your kid in it!?” What!? She said that? That isn’t what happened.
Beat herself up, sent me picture. “This is me without you. I’m literally tearing myself apart.”
Sent the same pictures to friends and family. “He beat me!”
Tried to convince our daughter that she witnessed me choking her out.
Good lord.
Life was good up until I caught her cheating the first time (verified anyway) and everything went nuts after that.
I have my daughter in therapy. For me, this chaos passed pretty quick. For her, it was a significant portion of her life.
swelter_spark@reddthat.com 7 hours ago
I suspect my mom has BPD or a similar condition because of similar behavior. She lied about me constantly, stole from me, randomly flew into intense rages which sometimes included physical attacks, and tried to sabotage everything I did. Now that she’s elderly, she wants my bf to change jobs so we can move to her state and live with her. 🙄
theangryseal@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
Man. I know everyone is different, but I believe we should look out for each other. I mean, as much torment as it was for me to spend all that time with someone with BPD, I realize that she couldn’t help it. As much as my daughter and I were traumatized, she couldn’t help it.
Maybe it was easier for me to empathize with her because I knew her my whole life, and I knew how she grew up. Her stepdad, the man who raised her, spent nearly a decade in prison for bludgeoning her mother with a pipe wrench, right in front of her. She spent all of her teenage years grounded and slaving away for her mom.
My mom was batshit crazy too, and in my 20s, I didn’t want anything to do with her. I got older though and got closer with my uncle, and the stuff he told me was just insane.
My mother witnessed her mother’s suicide when she was only four years old. Her youngest sibling was 10 years older than her, her father didn’t know what to do with her, so she was bounced around from family member to family member. Along the way she was sexually molested by multiple people. When she was about 11 years old, she moved back in with her father for a time. He had remarried, and she had to spend the next several years being molested by her stepbrother.
All of her siblings are upper middle class or wealthy. She has never had anything. The world cheated her.
Even her siblings are crazy, my aunt woke up, screaming like that and pulling our hair in the mornings. But they had been through hell.
It was chaos leading up to my grandmother’s suicide. My uncle said he spent his entire childhood, pulling his parents apart and getting in the middle of their fights.
I had to move in with my mom for a while after me and my ex split. It ended badly. I love her with all of my heart, we just can’t live together. She was pretty rough on me as a kid, but she her best, considering the life that she lived.
And I’m old enough now that I’ve seen a lot of improvement in my people, self even. I’ve seen them calm down.
I never knew my grandpa when he was the monster he used to be. The man I knew was an activist who worked his butt off to help abused and neglected children. He adopted many children, took care of me.
I don’t know, you do what works for you. You definitely don’t want to put yourself into a situation that can lead to hurt.
Best of luck to you.
I’d look after my mom if she needed me. It would be a lot, but I’d do it.
I’ll share a song with you that my mother wrote when I was a little kid. My bother and I both made our own thing out of it too, without realizing it.
“Mama, I remember you lying on the floor I seen the cold, cold gun that took you away forevermore I remember in my heart I didn’t know what was going on I didn’t know my life would soon be gone
Did you know what you were doing when you took your life from me? Every day I’ve lived through hell eternally
Mama, I forgive you no matter what you’ve done Mama now I understand just what was going on For I too have lived the life that you had to live And it is for that very reason, mama I can forgive”
I might have fudged it a little bit. She was about 23-25 when she wrote it and man, hearing her sing it done something to me and made it easier for me to forgive her.
I wish everyone would make art in some way. It helps us to see past the basic everyday shit and how it has affected us.
lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 1 day ago
Fuck, I had a friend like that. A best friend, no less. Made up a lot of stories and facts, always wanted to 1-up on skills he did not have, and would even do some stalkery shit as well.
When we reunited when he turned 30, he went to my house. When he was there, he told everyone else he was at “his girlfriend’s house”. That pissed me off. Also I could not tell if he was lying about some past sexual abuse from past coworkers he had or not.
Like you said, it was a mess. I’d rather be friendless with my computer than with him again.