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Comment on Anon gets a call from his past
xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days agoi personally know two men who were raped this way. One was into the girl and okay with it (they had been messing around before he passed out too)… the other was not and was traumatized by it.
if i know a couple myself, im betting it’s a lot more common than people think.
and there’s a notion that an erection = consent, when it absolutely doesn’t.
if it wasn’t for the much more common violent rape and/or murder that men did to women, this would be addressed a lot more.
sexual dimorphism is weird… especially when litigating. like, pregnancy is one reason raping a woman is “worse” (sorry, i just mean quantitatively… not emotionally)… and a man’s general physical size and strength advantage… risk and fear of harm….
so you can’t really sentence a woman the same as a man in this case and be fair… or maybe it should be exactly equal? i couldn’t say so simply….
this post kinda feels like incel/“men’s rights” bait.
what sucks about them is they take a few good points, mixed with delusions, to crazy conclusions and ruin any chance of reasonable discussion about it.
vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
well, that’s what i get for commenting on here
Bosht@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I get what you’re stating. 8 think there’s a point to be made on the financial implications in a male rape as well. If the dude is unconscious and raped, if it ends in a pregnancy unknown to the man, woman decides to keep it, she then has a free ticket to get the guy for 18 years of child support. I say this because it happened to a good friend of mine. Woman didn’t reach out until the kid was 16, boom, garnished wages for back child support. Completely fucked his financial stability, and the dude was married with 3 kids. Never knew the woman or the kid, literally lived on the other side of the US. There’s definitely some improvements that could be made to the current systems.
bss03@infosec.pub 1 day ago
He is definitely on the hook for child support because the child deserves those benefits, and that’s the way it should be.
Shared custody / co-parenting often reduces the raw financial burden, but the child still needs parenting and support, and if she’s the only one putting in time, then under Capitalism, he has to put in money.
Also, in many states, if the child gets governmental benefits based on being in a low-income family, the state will often aggressively seek out the other parent, even if the primary parent doesn’t really want to deal with them.
I’m not defending male rape, but I am defending taking care of all humans since none of us asked to be born. If the child (and everyone else) got UBI, there would be less (or no) reason for child support payments.
xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
that’s gotta be a scam or something… like, the woman stole some of his actual kid’s DNA from his trash, then submitted that Gattaca-style to fake the father.
i hope i didn’t just invent a new scam….
seems kinda more plausible, actually, otherwise why would she wait 16 years to cash in?
a suppose the kid being 16 would guarantee no custody battle, at least.
if that’s not an internet fantasy “a good friend”, i hope he has that dna double-checked against his own kids or double checked or something… a scammer would want to be across state lines too, as federal child support is better than a lot of states (after heard of a parent moving across state lines right after a split for this…)
bitchkat@lemmy.world 1 day ago
It’s possible she got knocked up from a spring break fling and never knew who the father was. Years later, she could have submitted her kids DNA to 23 and Me and got a match.
xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
all sorts of things are possible… i feel like i would remember a fling, but i have been fully blacked out before… i always had friends there to tell me stories of how dumb i was, so i probably didn’t father any kids i don’t know about….
but if some kid showed up out of the blue id be skeptical, hire a private detective and get extra third party testing…
well i would if i had enough money to be worth suing over….
Bosht@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Yeah they went through all the hoops, kid was his. Custody wasn’t a thing due to distance and being estranged for so long. Idk, you’d think something would be in the system to prevent it but it exists. Thankfully it didn’t cause issues with his current wife, and obviously his kids knowing didn’t need to be a thing. Basically just picked up a bill. Really is disgusting, and the chick that did it had like 2 or 3 kids, all different dads. So yeah, genetic scammer I guess?
xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
so crazy that he didn’t know the woman….
i suppose she could’ve drugged and raped him for a genetic scam, but it seems like a big chance to take… she’d have to know he had money, and to wait a long time wouldn’t make sense….
not to say he wasn’t raped just because she was predatory.
chances are some blackout, bar bathroom screw or something he forgot.
this is one reason i don’t get fully drunk anymore. anything could happen while you’re not in control, but you’re still responsible for what you did…. but i could totally have some kid from a forgotten woman in college.