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Comment on The consequences (of my actions) have been extreme

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

They hurt everyone else involved intentionally do to a sense of self richeousness. It’s a textbook definition of narcicism. It’s narcissistic for you and I to defend any of their actions as well. As you said. It’s narcissistic for us to think something is always someone else’s fault.

If someone calls the person they are going through a breakup with a self richeous dingbat who likes to tear down everyone around them in a private chat it’s not a nice thing to do. It also didn’t hurt that person until Derek brought it to their attention in an attempt to hurt the speaker while upsetting/hurting the person who was called names. Especially digging up things from years ago. These people aren’t running for office, they are kids dealing with life in a place of privacy. The number of people I’ve heard call soneone a little dicked asshole who isn’t good in bed is around 50. Never once would I think spreading that information to them or their friends group would be for the greater good. The person is hurt and lashing out. It’s often best to let them recover and sort out their own situation. If they were making plans to harm someone that’s another story, but that isn’t what happened here it appears.

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someguy3@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
At the point of sharing photos and Photoshopping someone to ridicule them, this isn’t an offhand comment said in frustration. This is planned and executed ridicule and mockery. He’s exposing the people for who they are because he thought their “friends” should know who they are and what they are doing. Not for the intent of “hurting everyone else involved intentionally due to a sense of self righteousness”. Whether you agree with what he thought or not, it’s not narcissism (by itself).At the point of sharing photos and Photoshopping someone to ridicule them, this isn’t an offhand comment said in frustration. This is planned and executed ridicule and mockery. He’s exposing the people for who they are because he thought their “friends” should know who they are and what they are doing. Not for the intent of “hurting everyone else involved intentionally due to a sense of self righteousness”. Whether you agree with what he thought or not, it’s not narcissism (by itself).

It’s also super bizarre that you want privacy for them *when they are fucking sharing photos (the context reading they were private) and sharing “raunchy texts”. Where was the privacy for their victims huh? They deserve what they got.

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- KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  
  At the point of sharing photos and Photoshopping someone to ridicule them, this isn’t an offhand comment said in frustration. This is planned and executed ridicule and mockery.
  
  i mean, we also don’t know what they are. It could be really bad, but it could also be harmless shitposting among the community.
  
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  - someguy3@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    You can look at the descriptors they chose to use, and that’s very likely playing it down big time. I’m betting it was extremely bad.
    
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    KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    yeah, but we also don’t know what they are posting, so it’s equally shitty to assume that what they are posting is substantially bad.
    
    Though assuming by the fallout, it seems like it was pretty bad? But then again i’ve seen friend groups break up over smaller shit.
    
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SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I don’t know about you, but I am very reluctant to insult others, even in private conversations, even if they might deserve it

I always try to approach things constructively, because in the end, those patterns and thoughts bleed out into the world and your behaviour

And do keep in mind, even from the person’s who was part of the asshole gang side of the story, it sounds pretty darn bad, and people have a tendency to downplay their side’s wrongdoings and elevate the other side’s. Chances are, it was probably quite bad

If there’s people in my life that go around talking badly about other like that, even in private… yeah, I’d want to stay the hell away from them too. It’s just a massive warming sign, and you’re going to be the target sooner or later. And you don’t want a coordinated group acting in bad faith against you

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