Comment on What was the 'bear vs man' controversy?

kitnaht@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

• pleasestopasking@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

  A viewpoint from someone who would choose the bear:: I don’t think all men are by default violent sexual predators. It’s much more about the fear that we won’t be believed.

  Nobody questions whether you wanted to be attacked by a bear. Nobody makes the case that the bear just made a mistake and we don’t want to ruin his future. Nobody suggests that you lead the bear on then changed your mind. It behooves us to be wary of being vulnerable with men until we have more information about the specific man we’re engaging with because of things go sideways there’s a good chance we’ll be blamed.

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  • jeffw@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    The person you’re responding to entirely missed the point and the accusation of misandry is misguided

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  • null_dot@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    A viewpoint from someone who is a man and not a sexual predator:: this statement is so incendiary because the odds of being mauled to death by a bear you meet are so high, while the odds of being sexually assaulted by a man you meet are so low.

    As someone who doesn’t live somewhere that has bears I don’t really know how it works, at first glance the phrase “come across a bear” implies a certainty of a revenant style bear fight, but I suppose if you know something about bear behavior can identify the type of bear maybe it’s not a big deal?

    Alternatively, how many encounters between lone women and lone men in the woods result in sexual assault? There’s some places in my area where people walk daily. There would be dozens of such encounters, and IDK the “sexual assault rate” but it would be a big deal if someone had been raped in the woods. Notwithstanding unreported assaults, I don’t think it’s something that’s happened? I’m guessing but I wouldn’t be surprised if the rate is less than 1 encounter in a million.

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    • rabber@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      As someone who spends nearly every weekend in the backcountry of vancouver island, most bears aren’t going to mess with you. But I’ve also been charged by a bear before like 10 years ago and I still sometimes have nightmares about it.

      Every single person I’ve ever come across outdoors has been good. I mean one time someone stole booze from my cooler while I was asleep one time. But that’s the worst that’s ever happened. But I guess I am a man so I can fight back.

      It’s really just a rage bait question because it lacks any detail. I think it would be a better question to ask would you rather be in an empty room with a random bear or with a random man.

      Like, are we talking about solo hiking and encountering people on the trail? People you find in the woods are chill. Or are we talking about a random man from anywhere in the world spawning in?

      It just pisses me off actually because it actually changed the way I act around solo lady hikers because now I just think I’m viewed as some creep. I don’t small talk anymore I just say hi and make it clear I don’t want to associate. Almost every woman I personally know who answered this question said they would rather come across a bear and that really sucks.

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      • null_dot@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Bears aside, I was looking at satellite imagery of this area a few weeks ago. It looks dreamy.

        I live in the south west corner of Western Australia which is obviously different but still a sparsely populated wilderness.

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  • DebatableRaccoon@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Sadly, the reverse has come to be true for a lot of men.

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  • rabber@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Anyone who says bear literally doesn’t know what a bear is and lives in some concrete jungle

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    • pleasestopasking@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Anyone so convinced of this has never been raped.

      I have in fact encountered a bear in the wild, a mama bear with her cub. They weren’t interested in me, just crossing my path trying to get to the river. I stopped walking and started talking so they’d know I was there. They went on their way, I waited a little bit to make sure they weren’t coming back, and then I went on mine.

      I’ve also been raped by a man I thought was my friend.

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      • rabber@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Wow you encountered one bear. How many men did you cross paths with just yesterday?

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• starman2112@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

  If you’re lost in the woods, would you rather run into a bear, or a man who is 10% larger than you and wants to have sex with you?

  Hopefully this rephrasing of the question helps you understand the answer women tend to give a little better

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  • kitnaht@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    See, this is a perfect example – this person very clearly thinks that all men only want to have sex. It paints that picture absolutely perfectly.

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    • starman2112@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      I’m really curious where I said that. Wanting something doesn’t mean you only want said thing, and the vast majority of men generally want to have sex with women. You can ask them, and they’ll tell you as much.

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