Comment on At what point in the relationship should I move in with my girlfriend?

• Flagstaff@programming.dev ⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

  Things aren’t so cut and dry:

  “Rhoades and Stanley used a representative sample of approximately 1,600 Americans who were married for the first time between 2010 and 2019. The study found that 34% of marriages ended among those who lived together before being engaged, while just 23% of marriages ended among couples who waited until after engagement or marriage to move in together.” - du.edu/…/new-du-study-highlights-risks-living-tog…

  This was also an interesting read: Are Couples That Live Together Before Marriage More Likely to Divorce?

  And that’s from Psychology Today, which is irreligious.

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  • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    A large percentage of the people who wait for marriage don’t believe in divorce at all. That doesn’t mean that they are all happily married.

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    • Flagstaff@programming.dev ⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      I… don’t disagree with you there.

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    • isyasad@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8847607/
      It’s not just divorce, there’s a variety of factors that are correlated with decision to cohabit. This article goes through a bunch, including for example, martial satisfaction (they call it “adjustment” in this paper) which in their sample was slightly lower in men who cohabit before marriage and a lot lower in women who cohabit before marriage. They don’t really speculate on the reasons for this, but I’ve heard it suggested that cohabitation increases marriages out of convenience among couples who probably wouldn’t have gotten married otherwise.
      Also important is that these impacts are long-term, and both cohabitation and marriage have positive outcomes in the short-term.

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  • FooBarrington@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    This may be good advice if your goal is to keep your relationship as long as possible, but that shouldn’t be your goal. It should be to be happy.

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