Acamon

@Acamon@lemmy.world

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Can you see magic eye pictures?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I love them! Generally find that once you get one it’s a lot easier. I find that if I’ve not looked at one for a while, and 8k kit getting it, and I go back to the first one I got (some boxing kangaroos) and normally it just clicks again.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How do you even find companies to work with ?⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  You could try doing some searches for companies in your area that do the sort of work your interested. Most of them will have some public facing site for attracting customers or just for corporate image. Then you can normally find an email or social media details to get in touch and explain what you can offer.

  And if the way you have to contact them is LinkedIn you might have to just suck it up. Almost no one who uses LinkedIn likes it. Like most things about employment, people just figure out how to give the right image for the industry they want to work in, and put on that professional front whenever they have to deal with the constant stream of bullshit. So if that means writing an upbeat “I think I could offer a lot of skills and passion to contribute to your organisation inspiring mission” type message to a 50yo self-centered ceo then, well, that’s how you get jobs sometimes.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Yep, I actually own 7,255 games on Steam. I’ve played 23% of my library. I regret nothing.⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I’m older than you my friend, and it’s acurallt only something that I came to terms with in my 40s. When I was younger I did feel that pressure and expectation to complete stuff. Now I have no issue switching a movie off after an hour or stopping a book before the end. Life’s too short! And sure a story game I’m really enjoying, why wouldn’t i finish it? And play the sequel! But if I’ve played 100+ hours of skyrim without geting close to the end, and I don’t think it reduced my enjoyment. And if I’m getting bored of a metrovania I don’t see the point in grinding til it’s done.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Yep, I actually own 7,255 games on Steam. I’ve played 23% of my library. I regret nothing.⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Nah, finishing games is overrated. By the time you’re halfway through a game, you’ve seen a lot of what it’s going to offer in terms of style and gameplay. For sure, you’ll miss some amazing stuff if you don’t get to the end, but it’s hard to believe you miss as much as the new other game you could have half-completed in the same time.

  There are exceptions, and I defintely think completing at least a few games is important. But if I had the choice of only having fully played 20 games in my entire life, or 40 halfway, I’d defintely have learned more, experienced more and enjoyed myself more with the half-assed approach.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  An Internet without privacy and encryption sounds awful. But one where it’s illegal to talk about politics and religion sounds pretty tempting at times…

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Cursed⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Bidwell, J. (1997)

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Check if you’ve actually got a mild fungal infection, that’s often the cause. Or you’re allergic to something.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨is it normal to feel tired for weeks after running and doing yoga every day for almost 6 months?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Are you having rest days? Rest and recovery are a pretty vital part of actually seeing any benefits from exercise. Especially since you’ve got a physically demanding job, your body might be crying out for some recovery time. If you really want to keep the habit of daily exercise, you could try splitting some of the activities out to alternating days, so you could still do some gentle yoga and stretching on ‘rest’ days, but only do the cardio and core on alternating days.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  If its important to you, and you’re capable of having grown-up conversations as a couple, then there’re probably lots of ways to figure it out. Start by taking the pressure completely off by telling him that you understand that it makes him uncomfortable and you’d never want to pressure him into something he’s not fully consenting to (can you imagine if it was a 20F posting that her older boyfriend keeps trying to push her to have sex in a situation she feels uncomfortable in?)

  Then try and find out what is actually the source of the issue for him, and if he wants to, work on that. If he deep down struggles to believe that your parents are cool with this guy banging their can’t-even-drink-in-a-bar* aged daughter then maybe your parents have to be more direct about giving their approval. I had a gf who’s parents had noisy sex when we were staying over and whose dad made super weird jokes like “we want her back in one piece <wink>” when we said goodnight. It was deeply awkward, but I certainly didn’t worry about them judging us for having sex.

  Similarly, if it just makes him feel self-conscious and that doesn’t make him feel very sexy, maybe you can start doing (consensual) minor sex stuff during the day while he’s visiting. Or spend time during the day watching TV or chatting in your bedroom with the door shut. And once he’s confortable spending time in your bed and in private, and he sees that your parents don’t judge him even though you could have been having sex, it’ll be easier to accept an overnight. And tbh, when staying in someone else’s house it’s much easier it have sex during the day when people are busy and there’s noise from TVs and stuff, than at night when any noise feels very obvious.

  But the main thing is to respect each other’s boundaries, and realise that some things take time.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Do you know what part is “too intimate”? Is it sleeping over in general, do you stay at his? Is it the awkwardness of your parents being around? Or, with intimate / all adults / private lives are you really talking about him not being comfortable having sex with his girlfriend in her parents house?

  All of those are pretty normal, but can probably be resolved in different ways. E.g if he just likes his own space, maybe starting with a single night staying over makes more sense than a few days, and at the weekend so it’s not disrupting his schedule or whatever he worries about.

  If it’s the sex one, I’d recommend a bit of empathy. Some people are really relaxed about sex and others are not. And as a guy, if I’m worrying about someone hearing us, how much noise the bed is making, etc it can be pretty hard to get in the mood and some guys can be worried about not being able ‘to perform’ especially when you’re both young and only been dating a short time. And it’s not as easily brushed aside as “don’t worry about it, they don’t care” once my mind is focused on what someone downstairs might be hearing and thinking, I’m not in the moment any more.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Is flirting redundant?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  I don’t see flirting as very different from making friends. The two biggest differences would be speed and boundaries.

  If I’m trying to make friends, I’d be mindful to not seem too keen and obvious, which is also generally good flirting advice, but sometimes you can be extremely obvious with flirting (the “nice boots, wanna fuck?” approach). I’m sure there are situations where saying “I want to be your friend!” is a good strategy but they’re pretty damn rare (and probably involve been on mdma).

  When you’re building any relationship or connection, one of the necessary steps is breaching boundaries. By sharing personal information (whether it’s hobbies, or a personal tragedy) or making jokes or teasing (if appropriate and appreciated) helps move a relationship from “stranger” to “friend”, similarly eating together, inviting someone into your home, or physical contact all represent breaking down boundaries and closer and more personal relationships.

  Different social groups have different ideas about appropriate behaviour at specific levels of relationship. I have social groups where being ‘cheeky’ and even outright mean to a new person is how they show they’re one of the gang. Similarly, there groups of people who can be lifelong friends, but still wouldn’t be comfortable hugging. For many people, flirting, especially if you’re aiming for a sexual relationship, often involves more physical boundary testing than with platonic friends (letting your hands touch, flicking dust off their clothes - and just FYI, if you’re not sure what you’re doing, it’s almost always better to let the other person be the first to initiate physical contact, especially if they’re a woman). But saying that, some straight guys I’ve known are very physical with male friends both with hugs and friendly punches, so it’s not a strict line.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Why is the progress pride flag so poorly designed (especially the intersex progress pride flag)? Will it be redesigned?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  The original Pride flag was designed with eight colours, but quickly moved to six and seven stripes because of issues with sourcing dyes and mass production. As others have said, each colour did have a specific meaning like Sex, Life, Harmony, Art, Sunlight. These were aspects of the queer community, but they did not mean specific or narrow identities, and did not only describe ‘gay’ or ‘lesbian’ people.

  In the words of Gilbert Baker (who designed the initial flag) “We needed something beautiful – something from us, and the rainbow is so perfect because it really fits our diversity in the sense of our race, our gender, all of those things.” Since then people have added specific colours and extra features to draw attention to identities that they felt were undervalued or overlooked, which is laudable goal, but not because the original did not include everyone.

  You’re throwing around a lot of strong negative claims about the discussion here, if you really want to make a case that the meaning of original flag did not include queer people who were black or whatever, please bring some sources. And just to note, personally I actually like the chevrons of the Progress flag, but that doesn’t invalidate people claiming that the original flag included everyone.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Why is the progress pride flag so poorly designed (especially the intersex progress pride flag)? Will it be redesigned?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  This gets my vote

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Instead of asking all my stupid questions separately, could I just get a ton of "How to Adult" type resources in the comments?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Fully sympathise. People are giving general advice, and there’s good evidence that it works for most people. I have adhd, and even I know that multi-tasking is distracting and that if I can focus entirely on something I will perform better. But I also know from decades of daily experience that if I try and completely focus on something when my brain is not compliant, then I will do much much worse.

  I will learn a lot more by listening to an audiobook while I do chores for an hour, even if sometimes the chores distract me from the content, compared with trying to read a book. Because if I sit and try and read, I will manage one minute, get up and get a drink, reread the same page, want some music to cover up some distracting noise, then rememeber that I’m avoiding distractions so turn the music off… And so on, until after ten minutes I’m only in page 2 and I give up in frustration, drained and demotivated.

  As an ever more aged adult, I think the one piece advice I’d give my younger self is “trust yourself”. I’ve wasted so much time trying to follow advice and rules that just never worked for me, and eventually I realise that my instincts were right and I should have just improved my own strategies instead of trying to become something I’m not. That’s not to say you know everything already. Listen to people, try their ideas out, experiment and all that, but don’t feel pressure to do what works for “most people” if it doesn’t work for you.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Why do websites now prefer IP-based geolocation rather than the `Accept-Language` HTTP header?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  You’re doing the Lord’s work. As someone who lives in a country where I can barely speak the language this is a constant frustration.

  I also hate how hard it is to override location for other searches. I travel back and forth to my native country regularly, and so I’m often trying to search stuff or buy things for a different country than the one I’m literally in. If Google is so keen on making money from me, why can’t I tell it to do a Product search in a specific country, instead of forcing me to use a vpn to trick it?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  This is something that I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about. I think there’s a danger to doomscrolling and upsetting yourself about things you can’t change, and it can be really unhealthy. But there’s also a real danger from turning away from the bad things that happen. And in my experience, the people who know least about the world, who “don’t follow politics”, etc are often the people responsible for the problems.

  Although wallowing in tragedy doesn’t help anyone, being aware that bad things happen and doing what you can in real life to make the world a better place is important. But the moderation is important - getting upset doesn’t help anyone. So I try to limit my time with current affairs to specific times reading articles and reports, so I can learn about the world in a calm way. Rather than the drip drip anxiety provoking chaos of 24 hour news and social media.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Historically, people did exactly that and collected info in commonplace books.

  Growing up back then I owned a lot of books (and borrow vastly more for friends and libraries). I had a couple of bookshelves in my room, but my family home had at least a dozen full sized bookshelfs. So although I didn’t have access to the infinite info of the modern Internet, I read a lot of much more specific non-fiction books. There’s a lot to be said about having a deeper and cohesive understanding of a subject, compared to reading a bunch of wiki articles and watching a few hours of YouTube on a topic (although I enjoy that too!)

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨why do some people put a space before a question mark or exclamation point?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  For me, it’s that my keyboard sometimes autocorrects to French.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨what's the word for a leg elbow?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Do you mean the popliteal?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Catchiest video game song?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  This is one of the songs I hum to myself to get rid of more annoying earworms

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Is there a community dedicated for serious discussion?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I don’t think crickets really means a lot when your commenting 1 hour after someone else…

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What would I need to do to successfully paint with my own menstrual blood?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Friend did this for an art project, it didn’t smell. Like all blood it dries to a kinda browny colour, but beyond that it was fairly unremarkable. The reactions from other people were certainly interesting though!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I'm working on a Sci-fi Point and Click adventure called Hope: A Sky Full of Ghosts. A demo is coming in a few weeks and would love a wishlist if that sounds like you jam.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Looks cool!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I think it was just that those were the four main classes in 1st and 2nd edition, with others seen as variations of those (e.g. paladins / rangers were basically fighter subclasses). In the Basic D&D line, they were the only four human classes.

  Due to this, adventure designers would include challenges that took advantage of thief skills, or Turn Undead, or whatever, to help all players contribute. Therefore, a smart party would have a mix of the main classes, because they knew they’d encounter obstacles that needed them (although it was never hard and fast, and a good adventure had multiple routes to victory.)

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Do you mean math classes/teaching? At school or university? Or just ‘mathematics’ as a concept? It’s pretty hard to be less abstract, when the basic idea of maths is abstraction.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨If I snapped you back in time 650 years right this very second, how would you use your current knowledge to succeed?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Many years ago when I thought about this, I realised I wouldn’t be able to put much of my modern knowledge and skills to use. I decided I’d learn to make basic matches by distilling urine into phosphate, which wasn’t invented until the 19th century, but I’ve forgotten the process. Collect lots of urine and boil it? Also, if you make white phosphate it can cause horrific toothache and they have to remove your jaw… So, I’m hoping another commentor will suggest a safer skill I can brush up to be ready for travel.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Oblivion Remastered troubleshooting⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I’m not criticising Linux gaming - I know basically nothing about it. Just my own experience over the last year, where I’ve tried buying and playing a couple of games and had difficulty getting them working, tried different Proton versions etc. But maybe I should be trying the window versions? My question was just innocent curiosity, but looking at my downvoters I’ve obviously touched a nerve!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Oblivion Remastered troubleshooting⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I’m not very experienced with Linux gaming, and the last game I tried (xcom) crashed consistently, and reading forums people were suggesting using certain Proton versions and other stuff. I eventually gave up. I also got uncharted:LOT refunded because I couldn’t get it working in Linux. So if it’s “click install and click play” the great! It is straightfoward.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What's the point in getting married?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I married my partner, after being with them for over a decade, and a few years of living together full-time. It was mostly for admin reasons (we just bought our home, and being married made things easier if one of us died). If it wasn’t for that I don’t think we would have bothered. We know we love each other, and had decided a few years before that if we’d get married if we ever needed to, so it wasn’t like we ever ‘proposed’. Just a tiny ceremony with two friends as witness, and we went out to a restaurant for lunch afterwards. I don’t think it cost us anything beyond lunch? Maybe a tiny admin fee?

  But… I’m so happy we did! It’s weird! I never really cared, and rationally, I still think it hasn’t changed anything. But somehow it feels… really nice? I still regularly think (and tell them) “I’m so glad I married you”. I’m sure there are lots of other things that you can do to symbolise your relationship or commitment. If I got a tattoo inspired by my partner I’d probably have the same feeling of looking at it and thinking of them that I do when I play with my wedding ring (2€ piece of silly junk from aliexpress. And we each bought a bunch of spares so that when we inevitably lose them it’s not a problem). But actually a marriage is one of the simplest and cheaper ways (if you don’t choose or feel pressured into turning it into a stupid moneysink).

  Tldr: didn’t care about marriage, got married for tax, and weirdly found it deeply satisfying in a completely unexpected way.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Oblivion Remastered troubleshooting⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s working on Linux? Was it straightforward to setup? I’ve given up buying games on steam because of their terrible Linux support, and I’d seen a lot of comments about the steam deck version sucking, so I’d assumed the Linux version wasn’t great. But maybe the deck hardware is the issue?