Churbleyimyam
@Churbleyimyam@lemm.ee
- Comment on Im flyinf to the USA from england 4 days ago:
Good luck not getting shot mate.
- Comment on Nine in ten honey samples from UK retailers fail authenticity test 1 week ago:
Apparently that’s why there is no organic honey produced in the UK. You need to be a certain distance away from land that is sprayed with chemicals to get organic certification for your honey and nowhere in the UK is that far away.
- Comment on I'm surprised it hasn't been taken down yet ...well maybe not that surprised 1 week ago:
I think Ghandi and his followers understood this.
- Comment on lemmy rn 1 week ago:
“The desire for power should automatically exclude you from having any.” Billy Connelly
- Comment on Stop Wasting Pumpkins! 2 weeks ago:
Man that is dark!
- Comment on Stop Wasting Pumpkins! 2 weeks ago:
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were travelling abroad and needed a place to sleep for the night. They stopped at a farm and asked the farmer if they could sleep there. The farmer said “Yes, you can. But all of you must promise not to have sex with my beautiful daughter.” They all solemnly agreed and were shown to their room for the night.
One by one though, each of them was overcome by temptation and sneaked down the hall to farmer’s daughter’s bedroom to have their wicked way with her.
I’m the morning they came downstairs and were greeted by the farmer. “Good morning!” he said, “I hope you all slept well. Take a basket each and go out and pick something from my farm to eat for breakfast”. Being very hungry from their travels they all eagerly went out to look for their favourite food.
The first to return was the Englishman. The farmer was waiting for him - with a loaded shotgun. “I know what you did last night!” shouted the farmer, pointing his gun at the Englishman. The Englishman threw his hands up in the air, dropping the basket of strawberries he’d picked for breakfast. “Bend over and put those strawberries up your arse and let that be a lesson to you!” The Englishman did as he was told and pushed the strawberries up his bum. Seeing that the farmer was satisfied the Englishman ran out the door and off into the distance.
Next to return was the Scotsman. “What did you pick for breakfast young man?” asked the farmer. “I picked carrots” answered the Scotsman. “Well put them up your arse you dirty bastard!” screamed the farmer, pulling out the shotgun “I know what you did last night!” “Please dont shoot me sir!” Cried the Scotsman, as he painfully pushed each of the carrots up his bum before making a break for it and running out of the house.
Last to return was the Irishman, carrying his basket on his back. “You dirty lying son of a bitch!” screamed the farmer “You had sex with my daughter last night!” “Now tell me what you picked for breakfast.”
The Irishman heaved his basket onto the floor with a thud.
They both looked down at its contents.
“I picked a pumpkin sir.”
- Comment on Britons are dying in a blizzard of cheap cocaine. Why is so little being done to save them? 2 weeks ago:
Sweet! I might get back into it!
- Comment on How do you even post that much 4 weeks ago:
lol
- Comment on Tap on the screen 1 month ago:
Definitely one for dadjokes
- Comment on Grind or something 1 month ago:
Junkies and crackheads were the true pioneers of hustle culture
- Comment on House spiders 2 months ago:
Cavespider sounds hardcore.
- Comment on Can't let go of my addiction 😔 2 months ago:
Whoever did this is an absolute legend.
- Comment on rizztastic 2 months ago:
When I was a kid I thought grownups were out of touch when they used slang and it made me cringe.
Now I’m a grownup I know that they did it to make me cringe.
- Comment on NHS referrals for anxiety in children more than double pre-Covid levels 2 months ago:
I was seriously appalled with how quick people were to turn on each other during the pandemic. It’s one thing to bitch about people with different politics than yours but quite another to grass up your neighbours for minor infractions. Also the kind of open jingoism between counties/regions during tier-system phase. It made me realise what it must have been like in the soviet union. Shocking to see our own capacity for that.
- Comment on Journalist Richard Medhurst arrested under Britain’s Terrorism Act 2 months ago:
What did he actually say? Plenty of high-profile people have denounced what’s happening in Gaza. Either he said something ‘extra’ or he’s been singled out for some reason…
- Comment on Public rights of way applications backlog concerns campaigners 2 months ago:
I think there is more than enough money in this country to take of it, it’s just in the wrong hands.
- Comment on Mike Lynch's co-defendant in US trial dies in UK road accident, lawyer says 2 months ago:
Strong Boeing vibes from this one.
- Comment on ‘It’s just a rich man’s playground now’: how St Ives became patient zero of British overtourism | Cornwall 3 months ago:
The thing that made me the saddest about this was when someone said that the second home owners don’t donate to the food bank.
- Comment on Malaysia is first country to issue ‘do not travel to UK' warning over riots 3 months ago:
What an absolute embarassment.
- Comment on More than 100 arrested in London as violence flares after Southport stabbings 3 months ago:
I’ve heard others say that too. It definitely removes chaos and chance from equation. I recently heard a former Australian PM asked how to get power and he said that it’s just a case of being a small faction and capturing a mainstream political party. Somehow that made it click with me how things are up for grabs if you are willing to accept the system as it is and exploit it, rather than completely rejecting it.
- Comment on Over half of UK adults will have dental disease by 2050, according to our research. 3 months ago:
I think anyone who has made it to 60 without any tooth decay should be given award! Especially with the amount of sugar in our diets.
- Comment on More than 100 arrested in London as violence flares after Southport stabbings 3 months ago:
I have to agree with you. I’ve tried my best to get on board with how the system functions, the outcomes it produces and forgive its flaws but it just doesn’t reflect my values. Apart from the physical destruction its causing, tolerating a system which is working against you like that for long enough just crushes your spirit. Accepting that I oppose it is liberating.
- Comment on Six people arrested after machete fight in Southend-on-Sea 3 months ago:
and a mass dispersal order was put into place
I.e “Piss off and do this somewhere else.”
- Comment on Six people arrested after machete fight in Southend-on-Sea 3 months ago:
I challenge thee to a duel.
- Comment on Anon is anti drugs 3 months ago:
Yeah, if it didn’t have such a reputation for being moreish I would probably dabble! I have enough going on with other stuff though.
- Comment on Anon is anti drugs 3 months ago:
I smoked it, the other guy injected. Thanks for reviving this old thread though.
- Comment on When you're too attached to that leather jacket you could barely zip up when you were 15 3 months ago:
Haven’t seen that ‘NY’ symbol for years
- Comment on Ah, the classics. 3 months ago:
Every cigarette you smoke adds 5 minutes to Kieth Richards life.
- Comment on Ah, the classics. 3 months ago:
Korn are touring!
- Comment on If everyone is fired by AI, who's going to buy the products and services made by the companies if no one has money anymore? 3 months ago:
Someone always has the money. That’s who will be buying things.