I come from a family with fairly rural roots. My parents were the only ones among their siblings to pursue college, and they raised me with an immense appreciation for education and the opportunities it brings. I currently hold a Masters degree in engineering and would like to pursue Law or an MBA in the future. My academic experience and qualifications are a significant part of who I am as an adult. As I continue to grow, I’ve noticed that it becomes harder to connect with some loved ones who are less educated and ultimately less adept at thinking critically and having discussions. I find that ideas, that to me are obvious, sometimes require significant effort from others to appreciate the full depth. Furthermore, I have also found that on average people are not interested in connecting with one another as deeply as I’m interested. For example, if I ask a question, I truly want to know the answer, I’m not just queuing up my own thoughts as response. I always try to be poetic and gracious when explaining these feelings because I’d imagine this would be received better than saying “I think people are dumb and hard to connect with”, but that’s how I feel a lot of times in plain English. I am interested in learning better ways to maintain relationships with people I may have these feelings my about.
I think the best way to do that is to remember that if the relationship is important to you then it’s your responsibility to be the one who tries, but you have to understand, some people just are hard to get along with, and others are just boring, but if you love or care for them you just accept that and find a way to bridge the gap between you and them. Understand that you may just have to give up, it is what it is, but making the effort absolves yourself of the guilt, you tried, it’s all any of us can do.
I find taking interest on what they’re interested in really helps, sometimes it will surprise you that their interests can become a shared interest. My kids and I can talk for hours about their stuff, and I’m just happy to participate.
Also, be a good listener, anyone can talk and be the life of the party and show off the charisma, but listening takes patience, understanding, empathy and compassion.
Best of luck to you.
Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org 38 minutes ago
Great. So you have found out. That’s good.
What’s not so good: you still think that you aren’t. You won’t get far with that attitude. One day you must learn that everybody is dumb, and needs the help of others. Maybe in different ways, but so what.
The brain does not make you better. The emotions don’t make them better, or the communication, etc.
Still everybody is valuable. Extremely valuable even. No human is more valuable or less valuable than another human. But all humans are unique, and you can have great times finding out what makes this one unique, and the next one…
Tell yourself such things when approaching your fellows in idiocy ;-)