“Playing and instrument”, for example, is likely not a tender accoustic guitar in the moonlight. It’s repetitive, monotonic, loud noise, that rarely resembles music most of the time, no matter the instrument.
Same with woodworking, it’s not sculpting a figurine with a knife and a pipe in your mouth. It’s FUCKING LOUD machines, wood dust everywhere (if you’re a hobbyist), every nook of your place becomes wood storage.
Most of the “attractive” hobbies might sound attractive, when you don’t really think about them and go with your first thought (that’s mostly based on depictions in films/tv shows, etc.)
Cataphract@lemmy.ml 6 days ago
Hiking - sounds attractive, but the woman may not actually enjoy hiking especially doing multiple day trails
Woodworking - “wow you made this desk yourself?!” Reality: Spent weeks designing and getting the right materials, spent more weeks in the shop getting everything right, spent months all together away and in a shop so you could present… a desk (the novelty runs out real quick with a partner)
Same with a lot of them, if you’re really into a hobby and it is presentable… You’ve spent a fuckton of time on it. Something you could do while you were single, 10x harder to pick up or continue doing in a relationship since your time is now divided. It becomes one of those, “Yeah they love doing photography and they’re really good at it!” (cue partner standing there who hasn’t taken a picture in over a year looking sheepish).
TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 6 days ago
my sister woodworks. Its so loud. On the bright side we now have a shop vac to clean the cars with so win win.
Cataphract@lemmy.ml 6 days ago
Oh yeah, equipment is definitely a perk. It’s kinda amazing how cheap shop vacs are too compared to going to a car wash repeatedly. But I think you jostled a caveat to all of these hobbies, being not broke lol. Could really put a strain on a relationship when you would previously sacrifice to get something but now you’re asking a partner to do the same.