Comment on Asking a girl out for comic book store date?
gregorum@lemm.ee 6 months agoI disagree. It’s not so binary, and taking the this approach can show that you’re not too eager, more motivated by exploring shared interests and getting to know the person, and, in doing so, thinking about more than your own motivations. All of these are critical to developing a relationship.
And if she’s interested in more, that’s up to her. While on the social outing, there will be plenty of opportunity for the verbal and non-verbal expiration and expression of further interest, and patience will pay off. “Jumping the gun” by being too aggressive is always a tune-off.
otp@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
I think my issue with it is that OP wants it to be a date. If it’s a date in OP’s mind, but he asks for a simple hangout, and she agrees, did OP get a date?
If OP thinks it’s a date and the girl doesn’t, then that’s setting up OP with problems down the line.
I don’t think it would come across as sleazy to make one’s intentions clear. Well, as long as it’s about a date, and not about sex, lol
gregorum@lemm.ee 6 months ago
It sounds like these kids don’t even know each other, so why start with a date anyway? As, her out to the comic book shop for a hang and see if they click. Be chill. They can talk, get to know each other more, and get more friendly. Then maybe they’re hungry after all that comic book shopping, and then they go on a date.
otp@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
I’m not sure what I did to make you feel old, but I’m old too! Haha
I get where you’re coming from too, and that’s probably how I would('ve) approach(ed) it myself. But that would be if I were okay with having a friend and getting rejected as a romantic interest down the line if that’s how it were to play out.
So, IMHO, OP would need to consider what they’re looking for and what they’re ok and not ok with. If they don’t want to end up with an awkward “I thought we were just friends, and I would never consider you romantically” conversation, then they should make a date clear. If they’re fine with hearing “Let’s just be friends” down the line, then a hangout is perfectly fine.
gregorum@lemm.ee 6 months ago
See, I think you’re really overthinking it, and they should let things proceed naturally and develop organically. OP stems nervous enough without putting on all the added pressure of immediately trying to define a relationship that doesn’t even exist yet with someone he barely knows. I think both of them can afford a little bit of space and time together to get to know each other first before delving into that. Let them talk first and hang out a little bit first. Not everything has to be so formal and rigidly planned.