I totally agree, except the final paragraph. I think the source of the communication issue is a combination of perceived tone in your initial comment and the sensitivity of the subject. Not to fully blame either. So I don’t think people are being belligerent or willfully ignorant.

Conversations like these are a minefield, so don’t take it personally if you stumble. And remember why the minefield is there in the first place. Sometimes you just gotta back out, or set off more mines you meant to disarm.

Metaphor got a bit lost, but I think you get the point.