Comment on Anon doesn't have a plan
Rekorse@sh.itjust.works 2 days agoYou can blame the parents because they enabled this behavior and are actively supporting it. Its very common with drug or alcohol addiction. Just because someone is an adult does not mean they are doing everything by themselves.
Hacksaw@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
I’m not saying they ARE doing something by themselves. I’m saying we can’t just take away their agency because of external factors.
At 38 you’re responsible for your life whether or not you had people supporting your basic needs until then. I don’t know why this is such a controversial take here.
The idea that it’s normal for your life to be WORSE when you have people providing you shelter and food and resources is insane. That’s not normal at all. This middle aged man has access to the internet and all the information in the world, they have had all the opportunity anyone had ever been given to realise they’re doing something wrong and to do something about it.
Unless you have an extreme case where a person was caged their whole lives and never had access to the external world you can’t just blame their parents anymore than you can blame capitalism or society.
rumschlumpel@feddit.org 2 days ago
It’s interesting how you completely refuse to entertain the idea that OOP has an actual health issue instead of just being some kind of lazy bum.
Hacksaw@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
Health issues and disabilities are an obstacle. They can even be an impediment to important aspects of life. But as an adult you’re expected to do what you can with what you have.
If you’re legs are paralysed and you’re in a wheelchair you’re not expected to do the same thing an able bodied person can. That’s why every modern country supports sick and disabled people, and makes accommodations for disabled people a legal requirement while prohibiting discrimination against sick and disabled people. But if you decide to stay in bed for the rest of your life that’s not because of your disability, that’s on you.
Half the people here think his parents haven’t done enough when if anything they’ve done too much.
Another bunch of people think it’s reasonable to expect the parents to train and ready him for society at 38. As if they have magical mind control that can force him to work on his life.
That’s not how it works. Parents don’t control me, or you, or any other adults in a modern country who don’t want to be controlled. Some people just suck. Hitler sucks. Trump sucks. Anon sucks. Nothing anyone’s parents can do about it. Look at Hegseth’s mom. You think she wouldn’t force him to fix his life if she could and stop being a useless piece of shit who only harms everything he touches? She can’t.
There is only so much your parents can do to make your life good, and there is only so much they can do to make it bad. Sure it can be a lot … But by 38 you have more agency over where you are in life than they do.
rumschlumpel@feddit.org 2 days ago
Are you seriously saying that every person with chronic health issues / disabilities would be able to work a job if they just really tried? There’s a huge variety of illnesses that is diametrically opposed to any kind of work life, e.g.:
ME/CFS
nonverbal autism
frequent panic attacks, e.g. due to extreme social anxiety, PTSD etc.
some kind of heavy chronic pain, like a fucked up back
heavy insomnia
fucked up arms
Even if it’s theoretically possible to make it work, it’s quite possible that even living with their parents, OOP doesn’t have access to the necessary healthcare, and depending on the exact region the laws might be not at all accomodating for employees with disabilities.