Comment on Anon follows the rules
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 5 days agoThat’s typically an economic issue, not a personhood issue. Not that it’s a bad thing to share housing between generations, it should be normalized as it was not long ago.
For us we have three generations under one roof because it works. Everyone pitches in, and having a grandparent around for occasional childcare is a godsend. Eventually we will be the care as they get into advanced age. There was a period of learning to let go of individual cultural hangups, but we all got over it in our own time.
The idea of every couple having their own individual single-family home and kicking kids out the moment they turn 18 is not just cruel, it’s completely unsustainable.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 5 days ago
I’m talking about emotional and financial co-dependency, like people who can afford to live on their own, who don’t choose to do so because they are unable to leave the nest.
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 5 days ago
I suppose I’d have to disagree with that last statement, as someone who lives in a functioning multi-generational household lol. It’s not going to work for everyone every time, depending on circumstances, but having 3 generations in the house pooling resources is how most of the world does it.
It certainly helps to have a separate space/entrance for privacy and such, but now that we’re settled in, it’s far better than it was when we were going it alone. We have everything covered between the 4 adults, and then some.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 5 days ago
Glad it works for you, for other folks, like myself, it would be a waking nightmare to live that way. Not everyone gets along with their family. For some people, being away from family is the only way they can be healthy and happy.
Further, again I"m not talking about multi-generational households by free choice or other cultural practices. I’m talking about people who are dependents, like they can’t function without their parents money or approval, and often are in toxic and abusive relationships with each other, where both parties would be better w/o the dependency.
deft@lemmy.wtf 4 days ago
I actually think this whole concept of independence is pretty bad for society. Americans are so isolated. I get people have shit families but we often have shit families because of this concept of independence being so important.
We have 0 sense of community in America and it stems from the me, me, me, my independence stuff.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 4 days ago
Cool. I don’t. I fucking love being independent and most independent people I know love it too. The most unhappy people I meet and have known were those who were co-dependent on their families, even if they were living alone, because they never developed emotional of fiscal dependence and a self of autonomy and self-actualization…
I don’t have a lack of a sense of community at all. But I go outside of my house and do fun shit at least 2-3 times a week. I don’t sit around on the internet complaining about how awful the world is and how awful my life is… weird how that works! Weird how being an independent self-actualizing adult is a really positive thing that makes life happy… and the alternative makes life miserable.
Almost as if you want to feel good about yourself you should… go outside and participate in life.
deft@lemmy.wtf 4 days ago
Dunno why you’re so aggro about it but okay. Nobody cares what you do and nobody is saying you don’t do them. Relax.
There is a difference between independent, in a community and codependent. It isn’t just codependent and independent.
You seem pretty angry though so maybe you should step back and think about why you’re so mad at others saying independence isn’t the greatest thing since slice bread lol