lol, I misread ‘licked’ as ‘kicked’— oops!
Comment on Something we can all agree on
danciestlobster@lemmy.zip 1 day agoPhilosophical question: is oral sex considered a kink? For that matter, are all sex acts considered kinks? Or is there some line between kinks and… Whatever you would call the other stuff?
homes@piefed.world 23 hours ago
froh42@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Yes. “Regular sex” is the kind where people just assume what the other wants, where they don’t talk about it and where they don’t agree about consent before and do what both think is “common practice”.
Kinky sex is where you find out what both like, whatever it is, what’s ok for both (consent) and where you have fun and do what the fuck you both like, not thinking about what the fuck someone else might think.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I don’t agree. Consent isn’t a kink. It’s a baseline bare minimum.
Without it, anything you do IS rape.
Kinky sex does require communication. From there you can go anywhere you both want.
But even standard vanilla no frills sex ALSO requires consent.
froh42@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
Should I have added a sarcasm marker? I experience it regularly that people involved in kink care about consent - and a lot of vanilla people don’t. Which is awful.
Yes, you always need consent.
danciestlobster@lemmy.zip 19 hours ago
That’s interesting. I would have said kink is more about the activity being done than the conversation and lead up to it. I mean the conversation is obviously important but I wouldn’t have thought part of the definition
froh42@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
Kink is stuff “out of the percieved norm”, so it has developed a culture of finding consent, that - sadly! - a lot of “normal people” don’t have.
I want this always.
(And I’ve probably confused the person following up to my comment with my attempt of sarcasm)