Philosophical question: is oral sex considered a kink? For that matter, are all sex acts considered kinks? Or is there some line between kinks and… Whatever you would call the other stuff?
Yes. “Regular sex” is the kind where people just assume what the other wants, where they don’t talk about it and where they don’t agree about consent before and do what both think is “common practice”.
Kinky sex is where you find out what both like, whatever it is, what’s ok for both (consent) and where you have fun and do what the fuck you both like, not thinking about what the fuck someone else might think.
Should I have added a sarcasm marker? I experience it regularly that people involved in kink care about consent - and a lot of vanilla people don’t. Which is awful.
That’s interesting. I would have said kink is more about the activity being done than the conversation and lead up to it. I mean the conversation is obviously important but I wouldn’t have thought part of the definition
danciestlobster@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
Philosophical question: is oral sex considered a kink? For that matter, are all sex acts considered kinks? Or is there some line between kinks and… Whatever you would call the other stuff?
froh42@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Yes. “Regular sex” is the kind where people just assume what the other wants, where they don’t talk about it and where they don’t agree about consent before and do what both think is “common practice”.
Kinky sex is where you find out what both like, whatever it is, what’s ok for both (consent) and where you have fun and do what the fuck you both like, not thinking about what the fuck someone else might think.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I don’t agree. Consent isn’t a kink. It’s a baseline bare minimum.
Without it, anything you do IS rape.
Kinky sex does require communication. From there you can go anywhere you both want.
But even standard vanilla no frills sex ALSO requires consent.
froh42@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
Should I have added a sarcasm marker? I experience it regularly that people involved in kink care about consent - and a lot of vanilla people don’t. Which is awful.
Yes, you always need consent.
danciestlobster@lemmy.zip 20 hours ago
That’s interesting. I would have said kink is more about the activity being done than the conversation and lead up to it. I mean the conversation is obviously important but I wouldn’t have thought part of the definition
homes@piefed.world 1 day ago
lol, I misread ‘licked’ as ‘kicked’— oops!