Comment on Anon is a paramedic
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 8 hours agoI think in the bubbles that we are in, including Lemmy, people with bad parents are overrepresented. Simply because of sexual minorities, progressive or radical ideas, or just plain old not conforming to the norm in terms of behaviour and character.
Plenty of people never had an issue with their parents, but also, plenty of people never had to tell their parents that they are homosexual, think their political beliefs are stupid, and have ADHD, for instance.
Plus, I would say that lonely people tend to flock together, likewise, people with no strong family ties probably end up using the internet more.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
i dont know, i know plenty of ‘normal’ people who are all over the internet. True though, they don’t really use reddit/lemmy sites, they use instragram, facebook, twitter.
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 7 hours ago
That is a bit of a hen-egg question, isnt it? Do people in certain circles see their parents negatively because the circles echo such thoughts, or because such circles attract people like that? I have no definite answer, tbh.
Maybe it is because those circles make it easier to speak about such things?
Maybe because someone who experienced hardships themselves might turn to more “left” ideas to avoid this happening to others?
I personally am very grateful to my parents, they sacrificed a lot of potential happiness for their children. And yes, they are flawed human beings in a flawed world, who make mistakes, have some issues of themselves and so on. But psychology is messy, fuzzy, and hard to wrap in nice logical statements.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
it’s easy to talk about such things in therapy, but a good therapist isn’t going to bias-confirm you, or engage you in escalation/exaggeration. online communities do that, inevitably.
your therapist also isn’t going to flip out at you and call you a ungrateful piece of shit when you complain about your parents. people online and irl will definitely do that.
there is a cultural default where you are not supposed to be critical or resentful towards your parents for sure, which I think forces almost all of us to internalize this stuff. personally i’ve never had a partner who i could talk to about my parental issues without serious blowback and judgement for what a shitty person i was for daring to say such things about my folks…
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 5 hours ago
Obviously, people online and even good irl friends cannot replace professional therapy.
I’ve seen both, the “social default” of having a somewhat ok relationship with one’s parents, and people in certain circles who tend to assume that there must be at least some difficulties.