Comment on A handy graphic to bring you up to speed on the Katy Perry/Ruby Rose situation.
Comrade_Spood@quokk.au 16 hours agoThey are talking about a trend with straight people, not accusing every straight person of being a rapist. Rule of thumb, if someone critiques an identity that you are a part of and the critique doesnt apply to you then its not about you. Coming in and saying this type of shit makes you seem like an asshole who isnt listening to marginalized peoples’ struggles.
Like for example I hear houseless people complain about nurses and doctors a lot because they tend to assume they are dope-seeking. If I was a nurse, I would listen and do my best not to be the kind of person they are talking. I would not tell them “You should stop generalizing, cause I don’t do that.” It feels very invalidating and makes you come off as very self-centered.
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 7 hours ago
That is a very general statement. I really dislike like such blanket statements. Because what is the difference between that and statements like “black people are dumb”, “Mexicans are drug dealers”, or, yes, “straight men are rapists”?
If someone critiques a whole identity, they should either make sure that it applies to all or at least the overwhelming majority of that identity, or be prepared to be called a bigot and prejudiced.
Comrade_Spood@quokk.au 7 hours ago
Read my reply to walk_blessed and you’ll get the nuance. I explain how its different from white supremacists generalizing black people.
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
So, your argument is, some of those groups are actually oppressed, therefore, it is inappropriate to throw in some of the actually oppressed groups in the same bin as obviously non-oppressed ones?
Yeah, that is a fair point, I guess. In retrospect, I should not have done this, if only because it distracts from the original argument, and I can see how it can be read as “look at me, a non-oppressed person, I am soo oppressed”. You live and learn, I never had the intention to make this about me, or any group I may be in.
I believe that my original argument, while maybe not exactly presented in the best way, still is valid: blanket statements against a group, any group, are bad. Some are worse than others in the context of how society treats them, sure, I agree with that.
Comrade_Spood@quokk.au 5 hours ago
Yeah basically. Like yeah generalizations are bad, like you say. But when we play the “not all straights” or “not all men” game, we are detracting from very real and very harmful issues facing a community. There is a reason women overwhelmingly pick the bear over the man in the hypothetical, and a man saying “not all men” does nothing to make that women want to pick him over the bear. Honestly, it often times would probably make the woman even more likely to pick the bear. Cause what you are doing is effectively making the topic about you, and you are telling the person “your generalization is more important to me than the problem you are talking about.” And because the people talking about the problem are marginalized (by definition, people without an influential voice), it only further covers up the message. As a white, straight-passing, and cis-passing man, yeah of course it hurts when I feel like someone is lumping me in as the problem. But I know its not my fault, and that its not really attacking me. And I know this because I try my damnedest to be an accomplice, not just an ally.*
*There is a very good zine called “Accomplices Not Allies: Abolishing the Ally Industrial Complex” written by Indigenous Action that I highly recommend. There is also another zine called “Queers Read This” that I also highly recommend. I linked both below.
https://www.indigenousaction.org/accomplices-not-allies-abolishing-the-ally-industrial-complex/
https://archive.qzap.org/index.php/Detail/Object/Show/object_id/184