Comment on Is the "Gen z stare" a real thing?
Smoogs@lemmy.world 1 day ago
That’s not genz thing. That’s the hot potato method of where you drop the potato on the ground and don’t play the games the sociopath wants to play.
This is a more widely used strategy now that mental therapy is more openly discussed. And the best way to win the game with a narcissist/sociopath is to not play their game. in the older days this was done in form of cutting contact. Don’t take their calls. Leave. Don’t interact.
Deadpan stare is a form of this as visual blocking.
Before the 80s so many people thought ‘I can change him!’ And after the 80s there were so many books about living loving a narcissist and how you can’t change him.
Now we just have the deadpan stare.
That’s not genz thing. That’s the hot potato method of where you drop the potato on the ground and don’t play the games the sociopath wants to play.
Yup, I have heard the same complaints about younger generations since the 1990s about Gen X, which are now passed on to us millenials. I’ve always heard the same old versus young fighting since I was a child.
Angrydeuce@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I guess it depends on the context.
Work in a customer service job? People are going to talk to you. They may ask you questions. Those questions may even be something you consider silly. But guess what? Thats part of working customer service! Youre paid a wage to…wait for it…serve customers. Part of serving customers is occasionally having to answer questions that you may or may not think are stupid.
But its not a big deal. There is no one on this planet that hasn’t asked a stupid question before. Even the person that works at the counter at Starbucks and is annoyed that Im asking a question and thinks its appropriate to stand there and blink at me rather than acknowledge I exist in some human way, ill bet any amount of money they asked a stupid assed question at some point in their lives and the person they asked almost definitely didnt just sit there and stare at them until they felt bad for asking it.
I guess my point is, the problem as I see it arent the people that play that game in their day to day, its the people that play that game when their whole job is to assist the public in some way. The context is different. You can do whatever you want in your personal life, but dont take a customer service job if you dont want to interact with customers. Youre paid a wage to answer those questions and assist customers whether you think theyre stupid or annoying or not. But dont worry, nobody forces anyone to work anywhere in this country anyway, so if that is truly too much to bear, there are plenty of other jobs that arent customer service out there, go do one of those.
Signed, a 40-something that has gotten the blink in response to questions like “is this where I pay?” when standing at the register at a diner, or “excuse me, where are the restrooms located?” when Ive got my 3 year old in tow and they need to go potty. If someone here thinks those are the appropriate sorts of questions to just stand there like a statue and not respond, please help me understand how, because I cant figure it out.
traxex@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
Yeah I’m noticing people in this thread claiming it is some social injustice to be asking people at their job to respond to simple people talk. Not even complicated questions or like, aggressive customer issues. Just a simple “hey is this where I order?” and they are spiraling.
Fucking weird.
Angrydeuce@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Honestly, and this is digging pretty deep here, I think it boils down to entitlement.
I work in IT, and as one of the more senior people at my firm, am often coaching the paid interns we have coming through in spring and fall. I’ve been doing this for over a decade now, and I’ve noticed some trends among these early 20-somethings fresh out of college that was not the case previously. Namely, the employee/employer relationship.
As an easy example, here’s a specific argument I have had to have virtually every single time one of the new interns starts: “I know we’re supposed to be here at 8am but does it really matter? So what if Im a few minutes late?”
Well, once in a while, sure, shit happens. We’re actually pretty loosey goosey with that stuff and don’t watch people’s punches. We don’t go looking for people the minute they’re supposed to be at work, we give people 15-20 minutes to settle in and all that shit, which in my mind is pretty fuckin reasonable. But even that is seemingly “too micromanage-y” for the interns lately, and I’ve found myself having to explain how being on time to work is important, not just for our firm, but like, for society to function. Im explaining to legal adults that they need to be to work on time and its an argument. And the thing is, after a point, here’s the answer they’re going to get: “Why does it matter? Because if you don’t do what you agreed to do, your internship is going to be terminated and you will not be receiving an offer from our firm.” And somehow that is unreasonable to them. They literally think they can come in to a new job and do whatever the fuck they want, breeze in 30 minutes late every day, and we’re the assholes for taking issue with that.
But that’s just one easy, universally recognized example. There are dozens more, every single day. “Aw man, you’re telling me I have to do this by hand?” Yes, that’s what Im telling you. “But that’s going to take ages!” I know, believe me, I’ve done this same task myself many times. “I don’t want to do this.” Yeah, I know, but it needs to be done, and everyone else is working on other tasks, so unfortunately you’re going to have to do it. “But I don’t want to, I think this is dumb.” Well, you’re entitled to thinking whatever you want, but Im telling you, I need you to do this, and I know you don’t have anything else going on because Im the one that gives you your daily task list every morning, so go ahead and get started and let me know if you have any questions. “But I still don’t want to do this!” I heard you, but I don’t care whether you want to do it or not, you’re being paid a wage in exchange for your labor and we need your labor on this specific task. “So I don’t get a say in it?” Well, NO, you don’t…what on earth would make you think you think that?
And that’s the question I never get an answer to. Where they think that they have a say in whether or not they perform a legal task being posed to them by their employer. They’re free to quit and get a different job, Im not stopping them. Honestly, I’d prefer if they’d just quit now then me have to dance this stupid dance every other day, explaining to literal adults that the whole reason they’re paid a wage is to do these sorts of things. Like what did they think, they were going to come in here and change the business to suit their whims? How fucking childish.
bss03@infosec.pub 1 day ago
Yes, they do. They can just go home, or walk around the block, or work on something else. No matter what your employer tells them, they aren’t a slave at any point in time.
Will there be consequences? Absolutely. They might get fired. They might get sued. If the task is sufficiently important the State might consider them not doing the task criminal negligence.
This isn’t entitlement, it’s choice and freedom, and perhaps having different priorities than the person assigning tasks. Everyone, including GenZ: Do you, and if you can try to spread joy and reduce suffering.
Do remember tho, someone has to keep the infrastructure working, and it’s often not clear where in joy in that lies.
Smoogs@lemmy.world 1 day ago
What you’re complaining about seems to just be what every generation has done on their first job. This isn’t a genz thing. This is how most people act on their first job until they learn how schedules work not just for them but for everyone to sync up. Their first time stepping out side of their school or family home.
Cuz that’s also part of your job as a boss: you have to also interact with these interns and teach them this. You do have to answer these stupid questions. Someone did it for you on your first job, and if you think they didnt: think again. Every generation has the entitled phase of when they first step out of the house and face the world who don’t kiss their asses like their parents did.
I just don’t get this generational ageism fight. It’s a stupid argument that gets us no where. It’s just about patting the self on the back at someone else’s expense.
No generation escaped going through this asshole phase.