Comment on Anon is terminally lonely

• UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I’m in my mid twenties and I can’t drive a car, I have a crappy job, and I still live with my parents.

  Can you hold someone’s hand while they rant about their shitty day? Can you pack a lunch, hail an Uber or find a bus for a day at the park, and rub someone’s feet while you both sit in the sun? Can you carry a tune or tell a joke? Can you show up on time for a date?

  You’d be surprised how many people can’t. Lots of people have shitty jobs in their mid twenties. Lots of people still live with their parents because rent is so obscene. You’re not alone.

  I feel like what I can bring to a relationship isn’t enough though.

  Meet other people. Show them a good time. Let them be the judge. Don’t hang this on yourself beforehand

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• captainlezbian@lemmy.world ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Would you want a woman who’s similar to you in what you can offer? If so, look for one. If not, wait. Regardless, work to resolve your sources of insecurity. Your crappy job is probably why you still live with your parents and times are tough, but pursue employment that allows for more independence. If a car is necessary and you can learn, start trying to learn. If not, develop comfort with your alternative transit options or look into trying to find a way to move somewhere where transit works for you. If none of that is possible, develop skills you think would make you a desirable partner. What do you want to offer?

  It’s so easy to find ourselves stuck in a hole in our lives and not understand that many of our problems are solvable. At the very least we can chip away at them.

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• Cracks_InTheWalls@sh.itjust.works ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Can you tell a joke? Treat women respectfully (not in a ‘nice guy’ way, in a general ‘I’m not gonna say fucked up shit to her’)? Hold a conversation? Create a sense of comfort and fun times (fun does not have to cost much, you can get creative)?

  This puts you miles ahead of some other guys with the right women. As a recently single guy, tentatively being open and flirty while watching the behaviours of others for comparison/research purposes, there’s some real assholes out there, and apparently that’s a pretty common experience for single women. The bar doesn’t seem all that high these days

  One thing I will say is that the aspects of your life that seem like liabilities in this post are changeable (with varying levels of effort), if you want to. Learning to drive is likely the lowest hanging fruit, which also gives you more freedom to try and improve the job situation and from there change your living situation.

  It can get better homie. Just one foot in front of the other, in the direction you want to go.

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