Comment on Anon is terminally lonely

fossilesque@mander.xyz ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

• Phoenix3875@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  The key to happiness is having zero expectations.

  anon rediscovers stoicism

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  • fossilesque@mander.xyz ⁨14⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

    The key to happiness is having zero expectations.

    Don’t slap a western coat of paint onto older teachings.

    One has the right to perform their expected duty, But not to the right to the fruits of action; One should not consider oneself as the doer of the action, Nor should one attach oneself to inaction.

    • Bhagavad Gita 2 : 47

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• 5715@feddit.org ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  The key to happiness is having zero expectations.

  I disagree. Zero expectations leads to rotting if you’re down already. As I understand it, zero expectations almost equals zero trust.

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  • TheTechnician27@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Zero expectations leads to rotting if you’re down already.

    “Expectations” are different from “goals”. The fastest way not to be happy is to treat happiness as an expectation.

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    • MalReynolds@slrpnk.net ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Happiness is fundamentally transitory and unsuitable for a goal, although setting up the circumstances for it to occur regularly isn’t a bad idea. Being at peace, satisfied, not bored, and others relevant to you are much more consistent and achievable, and you only need to rely on yourself to do so (happiness is often circumstantial).

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      • TheTechnician27@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Happiness is fundamentally transitory and unsuitable for a goal

        Oh, yeah, sorry, I didn’t mean to imply “don’t treat happiness as an expectation; treat it as a goal!”, because like you said, it’s fundamentally incompatible with what a goal is. I like to consider the SMART criteria, and even though it fails all of them (except ‘T’ if you insist you have a deadline to be happy), it fails ‘A’ the hardest, because it’s literally defined by how it’s oriented toward taking an action. If you think your goal is “I will be happy by doing X today”, then – as long as you think you can do X and have a plan – what you actually have is the goal “I will do X today” with the faulty, tacked-on expectation of “and that will make me feel happy”.

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    • 5715@feddit.org ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Call me pedantic, but that’s not zero expectations. I 100% agree on the happiness expectations to depression pipeline, but zero expectations to me is expecting a ROI of 0, that is expecting any effort to be wasteful.

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      • reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        expectations / reality

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• untorquer@quokk.au ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Lonliness is a significant driver of depression in modern society. Finding community and relationships can absolutely help. In fact friends and partners are generally the first people we need to talk to about our feelings.

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  • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Honestly, having good friends is super important, especially friends that you can have fun with on a compatible level. I have had over half a decade with no friends that I could do anything fun with, More like situationfriendships. Luckily I now have a friend that I can have consistent fun with, and we both have never felt better. Fun is so important in life, especially with other people.

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    • untorquer@quokk.au ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Its rare to find a friend who will try new things. Super great to just say, “lets do this thing!” and them to emphatically agree 😁 I used to have no choice but to do those things alone.

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    • RepleteLocum@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      So, how do I find them? I’m not in school and it’s not like I live in a capital city. I also want to keep my privacy so online services asking for pictures and full names is a no go too. Finding friends online is hard too, since I don’t use discord or the other mainstream apps. Not to mention my social and general anxiety.

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• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  The key to happiness is having zero expectations.

  Nope. Can’t agree with you. I don’t understand life, so I never know what to expect. Everyday I wake up and wonder what fresh new hell will await me in the headlines of the news, as the president continues to amaze me, and leave me in awe in all the new and creative ways he finds to globally embarass our whole country, and bring with it a new form of torture for all it’s citizens.

  The REAL secret to happyness is to have your butthole licked while riding a jetski, and eating an ice cream sunday.

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