I’m not trying to brag by saying this but I’m pretty attractive and if I wanted to get laid tomorrow I’d probably have no issue. But it’s like having access to infinite candy, I don’t think getting laid all the time without real human connection is healthy. So I uhh sort of don’t have sex either unless I have a real connection and it can take a while to find that. It makes it special again.
Comment on its a psyop, isn't it?
peopleproblems@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I used to think it was because I’m too ugly to be attractive to the women I find attractive.
Then I discovered I don’t really even try with women I find physically attractive because it’s relatively small on my attraction plate. If I find a woman who has intellect and the ability to talk on that trait, and a desire to learn with a bit of that physical goodness, hot damn with I put the effort in.
Worst case scenario I get rejected. Back to square one. Next one isn’t even that bad: I end up with a good friend, which is one more link to hopefully find someone who foots the bill.
That being said having a lengthy dry spell probably isn’t healthy, but I’ve managed it so far.
Xenny@lemmy.world 1 day ago
fonix232@fedia.io 1 day ago
It's okay to be vulnerable on the internet every now and then. Even on joke subs.
And to address your comment... This is something a lot of men misconstrue in general. They think that most women will want the 6'4, ripped, rich/tattooed/etc. guy. Which, to be fair, is true to some women, after all, people have types and feel physical attraction primarily on physical characteristics.
But that's not the whole reality. Thing is, men tend to be incredibly shallow most of the time, and completely ignore what women want. This makes the dating pool too, quite shallow.
Here's a list that will guarantee success with ~80% of women:
D_C@sh.itjust.works 20 hours ago
Nice, some tips to follow. I’m in.
…
“Don’t be a creep”
I’m out
peopleproblems@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I want to add that some people are completely unaware that they are being creepy. Others are entirely aware, and I don’t understand how they dont realize they’re gonna get got one day.
You are a creep if:
You like to get closer than you realistically should. Ask to close the distance if you were originally sitting apart, then let the other person get comfortable. If they adjust their distance, don’t get any fucking closer than that.
There are a lot of things you might want to say sober, but don’t. Probably a good idea to pay attention to these things if you have liquor in your system and notice when you no longer have control over that. If you don’t notice, maybe it’s better not to drink and rethink your life.
Don’t fucking grab, sniff, tickle, or seductively eye the other person. Just don’t. Grow up.
Don’t go diving through their social media like you need to learn all about them before you meet. Chances are they know exactly what is public, and they intend that public information to be a different person than they really are.
If you don’t know something about them, ask. If they don’t give you an answer, stop fucking asking. God. They don’t want to tell you.
If it involves sex, and you’re in public, don’t talk about it. That’s creepy.
If you ever receive a inconclusive answer, that’s a hint to back the fuck off that discussion.
There’s too much to list, but those are like a bunch I’ve seen.
Angelevo@feddit.nl 19 hours ago
Excellent general rules; culture provides differences.
Take some time to consider how the other party is feeling, empathize, use your senses. If you have trouble doing so, use your imagination. Link behavioral traits to emotions. Behave accordingly. Feel it out.
For many people, all of this comes natural. The others can learn by reading the cues and responses. It is hard work, yet valuable as it allows you to connect on a different level.
We are complex creatures.