Farts In particular, what to say after you fart in a crowd (or elevator).

“Take that!”

“What do you say?” like prompting a child to say thank you.

“That’ll be five bucks, you pervert”

“Not a bad sound out of a half inch speaker”

“Did you hear that spider bark?"

“Someone step on a duck?”

“That duck’s got bad breath”

Forest Area Reticulated Tree Spiders (FARTS)

“A bit more choke and that engine will start”

“Did you hear what that asshole just said?”

“There’s someone behind me talking shit!”

“Keep shouting Sir, we’ll find you”

“So sayeth the King”

“I shouldn’t have trusted that one”

“I don’t remember eating that.”

“That’s gonna itch when it dries”

‘‘Two sniffs of that would be greedy’’

“The the horns working, now try the lights”

“Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk”

“The Rear Admiral has spoken”

(Just before you fart) “Alexa, play something by Ed Sheeran”

 “Don’t worry, (name), I’ll tell them it was me!”

“You’ve/I’ve got a turd honking for the right of way.”

“Ahh, the ghost of dinners past”

“You got that one for free, next one you will have to pull my finger”

“As foretold by The Prophecy.”

“Now your turn”

The toothless one speaks !

“Sounds much better after my tune up”

“Aaaand…scene!”

“That was supposed to be a song but came out of the wrong end”

“Message from turd castle”

“Glad I’m not in my Space Suit”

“Damn! I was saving that for the elevator”

“An empty house is better than a bad tenant”

“Guess what I had for my last meal”

“This haaause is noww cleeeean”

“carpet frogs”

“Now that I have your attention, we will have a moment of silence for all those that have died in elevator accidents”