What did it for me was the bugs. Those little fruit-fly fuckers… they love sugar, and those taps are a concentrated source. Until someone turns it on, and they get blasted off the tube and stuck onto the sticky inside surface of the cap, where they die and continue to get blasted with concentrate, so there’s this membrane of soda residue, dead fruit flies, and mold.

…infact the taste you’re referencing might legit be rotting bugs if it has a kind of rancid protein flavor.

I wonder how many of those fruit flies get blasted straight into people’s drink vs onto the edge of the cap, where they’re just sucked up through a straw and drank by a customer who’s none the wiser.

Nom nom.