Predators
honestly… I would be happy to have more people just for the sake of meeting them and having a fun friends day out. Does not need to be a date. We could just hangout.
Comment on Has this ever happened to you?
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 5 days agoThe test was “Is this guy so desperately horny that he’ll pay for meals and drinks for two, even though neither one of us has any intention of having sex with him, and having a friend along makes it even easier to steer the conversation away from any path that might lead to sex?”
Yeah, that’s a test you want to fail. Those women are predators.
MadhuGururajan@programming.dev 5 days ago
SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 4 days ago
Then join a club or something.
Dating isn’t about making friends.
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 4 days ago
Yeah, that’s great if it’s just a hang, but that’s not what this was. This was clearly supposed to be a serious date, the kind that hopefully leads to a relationship, sex, a life together, marriage, kids, retirement, etc.
If I’m taking a girl out for a nice romantic dinner, I’m expecting a certain sort of meeting, and I’m willing to pay significantly more to create the atmosphere in which we can open up and start to explore the idea of a future.
But if she decides she wants to bring a friend, that changes everything. Now the entire dynamic of the date has changed, and we can’t have the kind of personal conversation I’d like to have (and she would want to have, if she was being honest about accepting the date), and splurging on a fancy restaurant is a waste.
If she decides that she’d rather have a fun, casual hang-out, that’s fine, but I was looking for a serious date. I’m not willing to spend the same kind of money on a friendly hang-out as I would on a serious date, and it’s pretty offensive that my date has unilaterally decided that we won’t be having a serious date, we will have a casual hang-out with her friend, but they still expect me to pay for it as if it was that original serious date.
She did not accept this date in Good Faith, and he is under no obligation to indulge her disingenuous behavior. He’s actually lucky that her true nature became apparent BEFORE he spent a lot of money on her. Save that for a girl who isn’t a predator.
echodot@feddit.uk 4 days ago
Yeah the problem with that conspiracy theory of yours is nowhere in the text does it ever even suggest that there is any expectation that the friend would have to be paid for. Or indeed that the guy in is even being expected to pay for the girls meal.
It also sounds like a first date, which is not something that is usually all that elaborate, so if this is some evil trap to get free food it’s going to basically be a taco maybe a sandwich something not something worth the effort.
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 4 days ago
Do you understand how conversation works?
When he says he isn’t paying for the friend, the proper thing to say is that he isn’t expected to pay for her, she’s just there for safety.
But she doesn’t say that, she justifies her friend’s presence, which isn’t his issue. His problem is paying for it, and she carefully avoids confirming that she doesn’t expect that, which means that she DOES expect that.
Not once did she tell him that he wouldn’t have to pay for her friend, despite him being very clear that was his objection. She expected him to pay.