It wasn’t rude at all, it was one of the most neutral ways of “correcting” someone (in quotes because yes the correction was wrong) but it was basically “I think it’s actually X” which is about as non-aggressive as it can get.
The issue I take with it is not at all about group dynamics. Even if it’s one guy saying this to another, if someone is going to call that “mansplaining” I have an issue with it because it’s just explaining. Incorrectly, and maybe very slightly patronizingly (but only because the person being spoken to is a scientist and not because of the way it’s said), but still at its core simply explaining something they think is true. That is the core of scientific discourse and I don’t care what the genders are, giving it a stupid name and using that as an insult is antithetical to the open and curious exchange of information.
squaresinger@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
My biggest pet peeve with terms like “mansplaining” is that it does contain a real issue with some actual definition, but then it uses such a blunt and crude word that’s just plain besides the point of what it actually means.
If this was a term against women, feminists would be up in arms because the stupid terminology almost guarantees that it will be understood and used wrong.
Because fundamentally, the word itself is man+explaining, and it’s used just like that: Whenever a man explains something a woman doesn’t want to hear, it’s mansplaining. No matter who is the expert in the field.
In a prior job I was head of software development. I built the team, I built all the software, I worked on all the hardware we sold.
We hired a new marketing person. She had no prior experience, it was her first job in the field after returning from a long maternity break and before that she worked in an unrelated field. She put stuff into marketing material that was plain wrong. She listed features that we not only didn’t have, but that didn’t actually apply to the whole product category. When I pointed that out, she tried to shut it down with “Don’t mansplain”.
The concept behind “mansplaining” is real and it is a problem in some circumstances. But the term is toxic and needs to go.
(Similar story with the term “toxic masculinity”, which is often understood as “all masculinity is toxic”, not as “machismo”. This one really annoys me, since we already had a really good term, “machismo”.)
Warl0k3@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
I agree - the term has reached a point where at this point it’s become an alt-right dogwhistle. The phenomenon is real, and really extremely common, and a new term should absolutely be introduced so that discussion of the concept isn’t derailed by people constantly going “ugh it’s such an oppressive thing”.
Side note:
(I wouldn’t normally point this out, but it’s beside the point. That you’re making a (literal, not dismissing you) semantic argument and the first sentence has a semantic error was too amusing not to point out.)
squaresinger@lemmy.world 9 hours ago
You are right that any term can be destroyed by the alt-right, that’s totally true (I mean they got the term “walkable city” to mean something like “apocalyptic ghetto” in their sphere), but I think that “mansplaining” (and to a slightly lesser degree “toxic masculinity”) were already dead on arrival.
Mansplaining is such a bad term, that it already doesn’t work without the alt-right touching it.
At least in German speaking counties (can’t speak for the rest of the world), feminism is known for being really particular with words used for/against women, because they know that words shape understanding. For the last 20 or so years we have had (and still have) a quite heated discussion about gender-correct language¹. But instead of applying the same scrutiny to terms used for men, these terms are just adopted without question.
I just want the same scrutiny to be applied for all terms. “Hysteria” is rightfully a word that dropped out of use, and so should “mansplaining” be.
Why not just use a gender-neutral word like “overexplaining” or just describe what’s the problem instead of using a fighting term that only causes pushback instead of actually helping people understand problematic behaviour?
¹ German is a gendered language, meaning almost every term has distinct male and female versions, and gender-correct language means that you use constructs that mention both genders. The reasoning is that using the generic masculinum (aka, use the male version if you don’t care about the gender) leads to people not considering women, so e.g. when you hear “Arzt” ( (male) doctor) it makes women working in that job invisible and shapes who wants to become a doctor. Similar with female-first terms like “Schwester” (which means “nurse” or “sister”).
Warl0k3@lemmy.world 9 hours ago
Because it’s not a gender-neutral problem. In a non-gendered language, an explicitly gendered term is generally used for strong emphasis. I’m sorry, I just don’t know why insights about semantics in a gendered language are relevant in a discussion of a non-gendered language. It’s not that it’s not interesting I just don’t know how to address this. Does german have the word “mansplaining” too…?