Comment on Is Catholic dating culture often mistaken for incel-style pessimistic desperation?
philycheeze@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks agoWell my question was for clarification on the Catholic Dating Culture.
Your bullet points do not address that and as such you are not giving enough context to enable any kind of real answer from those of us who don’t know what you’re talking about. I tried searching for some kind of definition on my own but that only produces religious focused dating blogs.
dullbananas@lemmy.ca 3 weeks ago
Some of the listed things mean that Catholics might put more effort into finding someone, compared to secular dating. Also, people seem to see insanity in how Catholic dating connects to marriage, but I don’t know exactly how that’s perceived. I might not be familiar enough with other dating cultures to know what is relevant.
erin@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 weeks ago
For context I guess, here’s my views on the list you posted, as someone who is very much not religious and dated plenty before finding my fiancee:
Marriage might be awesome for some, but it’s also not for everyone, and there are far too many bad marriages that could’ve been good casual relationships
Standards are definitely good to have, but I guarantee mine are very different than the average Catholic
No shame in being single. Better to be single than in a toxic relationship just for the sake of a relationship.
I probably couldn’t see myself marrying a religious person, but if their beliefs don’t infringe on other’s rights then I guess they can do them.
Sex is just sex, cohabitation is convenient, cheaper, and pleasant. I’ve never been married and I’ve lived more of my adult life with a roommate or partner than not. I also don’t believe sex needs to be confined within the boundaries of a relationship either, and I have sex with people that aren’t my fiancee, both with and without her, though that’s definitely uncommon and always done with the full consent of all parties.
Dating could be for finding a future spouse. It could also just be for fun, or for a casual relationship, or a long term relationship with no intent to marry.
Relatively wide variety in how long people date before marriage, if ever. I never planned on it for years, but I met my fiancee and changed my mind. We dated for a year before getting engaged.
Normal to date in highschool.
Obviously this is only my perspective. No judgement, to each their own. Other than the views on polyamory (though more accurately, just sex. Open relationship? I don’t have a label for it), these opinions seem very common among the average dating population. My sample may be skewed since I’m bisexual and over half my relationships have been gay.
dullbananas@lemmy.ca 3 weeks ago
I’m curious, do you think of sex more as “like ice cream but better” or “like hugging but better”?
erin@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 weeks ago
I wouldn’t say either. Sex is way more intimate than just hugging. I’d say it’s like “making out” but better. It’s lots of fun, and I don’t care about the societal norms restricting it between romantic partners. Pregnancy isn’t a risk for me, and I’m very careful to avoid STDs. I haven’t had sex with someone without a recent STD panel, and I use protection when necessary. My fiancee feels the same way, so I have sex with my friends all the time