saltnotsugar
@saltnotsugar@lemmy.world
- Comment on Biomimicry 2 weeks ago:
So you’re a termite?
“…uhhh totally.”
What do we like to eat?
“Stuff and wood and junk.”
Okay good enough. - Comment on [deleted] 2 weeks ago:
#5 sleeping dicks out like Winnie the Pooh.
- Comment on It's too hot to think of why or how 2 weeks ago:
It’s a lot like a battle where at first you have controlled volley fire, but later the panicked lieutenant shouts out to fire at will.
- Comment on I am calling corporate! 3 weeks ago:
Hickory smoked boner.
- Comment on Horses go brr 4 weeks ago:
APACHE DOOM MUSIC INTENSIFIES
- Comment on Jurassic Squawk 4 weeks ago:
Goose: Hark! Lost is my mass, but look upon my fury and despair!
- Comment on Add it to the pile of reasons to hate 'em 4 weeks ago:
Al is Arabic for “the,” “um” was because the scientist forgot what he wanted to say, “in” means inside, and “um” also means the scientist forgot what to say and likely ran away.
- Comment on What the fuck 4 weeks ago:
A rare turbo pregnancy!
- Comment on And if so, one or both? 4 weeks ago:
You haven’t lost your virginity until both balls are in.
- Comment on The real question is, which color? 4 weeks ago:
Lime Green Skittle Script:
(Bond opens the ring)
Bond: Damn. I’ve been…Skittled.
(Bond music opening)
HE HAS A RING.
A LITTLE GOLDEN RING.
FILLED WITH ONE.
AND ONLY ONE.
LIME GREEN SKITTLE. - Comment on mood 4 weeks ago:
Sorry Nike, but turn your logo upside down, kick off those sneakers and light up a NEWPORT.
- Comment on Thing makes noise wallet goes empty 4 weeks ago:
The violent rumbling is actually a relaxing massage.
- Comment on parlez-vous francais? 4 weeks ago:
Non, monsieur. Eye vill not recommend a wine for yur chickon streeps.
- Comment on Real af 4 weeks ago:
It pays off in the moment but then you die to death the next day.
- Comment on Is that the Crowning they talk of 4 weeks ago:
(A girl is born)
Doc: BRING FORWARD THE LARGEST BOW. - Comment on Oh no 4 weeks ago:
We need more militant soup activists.
- Comment on Zwei Mettbrötchen bitte! 4 weeks ago:
This is by a wide margin one of the most hard hitting sandwiches to ever play the game.
- Comment on Bugs 5 weeks ago:
Some say they’re feisty, but I think they work great as a team.
- Comment on Feels wrong to not answer the call 5 weeks ago:
(Tube bends slightly) The age of man is over.
- Comment on Peak male form 5 weeks ago:
You guys said no mustaches! Oh come on!
- Comment on News of the day 5 weeks ago:
The Denny’s waitress rolled her eyes when I asked which wine pairs best with the chicken strips.
- Comment on What grass starvation does to the perma-online 5 weeks ago:
Anal is now first base.
- Comment on Winging it 5 weeks ago:
You know who we should use as a Jesus model? Jeff in accounting.
- Comment on 🤯🤯🤯 5 weeks ago:
Did you know you can just buy these in the store? Like you don’t need a realtor or anything!
- Comment on Looking for the perfect 5 year anniversary gift? 5 weeks ago:
AI, you’ve always been the caretaker of the Overlook hotel.
- Comment on Sir! A second Click meme has hit Lemmy 5 weeks ago:
One will gently clean, and the other will turbo scrub.
- Comment on Gladly :3 5 weeks ago:
B-But I’m not a Linux admin!
- Comment on kwah 5 weeks ago:
L’dong bon hon et long un croissant!
My hamster has run off with my croissant!
HOH! Hoh hoh! Hoh!