I'm cumming

Comments

• BenFranklinsDick@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  My ex-girlfriend used to break oatmeal cookies over my bare chest and would vacuum it up with a Bissell handheld vacuum. She’d call me her oatmeal boy and make me empty the vacuum after we were done.

  She got out of prison last year and tried to crash at my place. Haven’t heard from her since.

  source

  • PinkyCoyote@sopuli.xyz ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’d like her number if you wouldn’t mind

    source
  • piracysails@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Now, that’s a story.

    source
  • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Classic Ben Franklin.

    source

    • Noodle07@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      She wanted that D

      source
  • deuleb_biezelbob@programming.dev ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Is she into milk?

    source
• ClassifiedPancake@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  It wasn’t worth vacuuming if it doesn’t crackle.

  source