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I just got so many panic attacks during my trip. Of course, I didn’t understand what they were but thought I had lost my mind for good instead. Time stopped, I couldn’t think straight, couldn’t calm myself down, at times I couldn’t parse other people’s speech and everything was just damn scary the whole time. And felt like an eternity.

After the trip, I was afraid of anything I deemed “not normal” for months. I got scared by my vision going black when blinking, the occasinal weird joke someone would make, bird noises in the winter, awkward social situations, anything you could imagine being “not normal”. Now after ten years, I occasionally get that when something peculiar happens, but it’s not a constant thing as it used to be. Maybe once a day I get “half triggered” by something but usually I can calm myself down.

I think the whole bad trip was caused by me being generally prone to getting panic attacks (which I hadn’t even realized yet), and bad set and setting. Dark outside, with friends that I didn’t fully trust.

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96VXb9ktTjFnRi@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
Sounds like what you needed was someone you trust, that’s sober, that would tell you: 'listen, you are currently under the influence of this drug, that effect will pass and you’ll go back to normal, nothing terrible has happened, you are just having a panic attack that’s being magnified by the drugs, but really, nothing bad has happened, none of this will last, the drugs will lose their effect soon, and there is nothing to worry about except for your panic attack right now, that must be very uncomfortable. so let’s try to calm down, let’s focus on breathing together for a bit so we can stop your panic reaction.

I’ve regretted having a sitter present when I introduced LSD to some friends. One of them got a message on his phone, that got him very confused, and although we managed to calm him down eventually, he experienced some severe panic, that I feel I could’ve handled a lot better when I was sober, but unfortunately I was also under the influence. I myself having taken psychedelics monthly for over a decade now, I tend to underestimate the psychological risks for new users, that’s what I took from that experience, and I won’t let it happen again. Psychedelics always need proper set and setting, and new users should have an experienced, familair tripsitter present, always. My friend didn’t have lasting negative effects from the experience but your story proofs that it’s definitely risky and measures should be taken to always take them with precaution.

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- nimpnin@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
  I don’t think it’s helpful to tell people that bad trips are avoidable. The probability can be lowered and consequences can be mitigated to some extent but the risk is always there.
  
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- MutilationWave@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
  
  I’ve regretted having a sitter present
  
  Did you mean you regretted not having a sitter present?
  
  Not meaning to discount your experience at all I just want it clear what you mean to people reading.
  
  I think trip sitters are a downer even when they’re a pschonaut. They could be a pure soul just there to help or whatever but they can’t vibe.
  
  I’ve always, except for one time, been able to calm friends or even people I barely know. One man I just met that day, the brother of a friend, asked me to hold his hand while we were blasting through the crazy part. Of course I did. I held his hand for what felt like forever while we all lay in the floor together.
  
  The only person I’ve been unable to calm is my wife. We have our issues. But if you’re a person’s easiest target when they don’t know what to do with their feelings, it can be tough. When that person literally tells you to go away and not bother them while they make a bad trip for themself, how could I violate that.
  
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  - 96VXb9ktTjFnRi@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
    Yes, you’re right I regretted NOT having a sitter present. I can understand that sitters can be an uncomfortable presence when all is well and I wouldn’t say you always need them there, but specifically when it’s peoples first time taking psychedlics I think it can be a wise precaution to take. Surely, most of the time everything will be fine, but it’s a safeguard for the occasion that it’s not ok. I think the sitter should probably bring a book or something and do his own thing, as you’re not on the same level you should probably not intervene in any way when it’s not needed.
    
    When that person literally tells you to go away and not bother them while they make a bad trip for themself, how could I violate that. I agree, I guess I would just respect that. Go with the flow, if one does not want help, pushing help onto them is probably not the least bit helpfull.
    
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MutilationWave@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
I’m so sorry that this happened to you.

If you will please entertain my question?

When you say “I didn’t understand what they were” what did you think you were taking?

I’m grateful that you can recognize that your reactions were not necessarily due to what you took but external factors.

I personally believe this PTSD could be permanently fixed by trying again in a safe place with people you trust. I am happy to answer any questions you may have publicly or privately, or just talk. I’m not a qualified expert, I’ve just taken a fucking shit ton of mushrooms over the years.

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- nimpnin@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
  As I mentioned, I didn’t understand that I was having a panic attack. Mind you, there were periods of time when the words of my friends just felt like gibberish to me. I was not capable of coherent thought.
  
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