I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me. Probably childhood abandonment, abuse, and neglect.

My poor mom tried, she really did. She was abandoned, abused, and neglected too. A lot of things that would have seemed absurd to a healthy person were normal for her so she tolerated a lot and expected a lot. She suffered so much as a kid that whatever idea she had about family, she was sticking to.

I have no close friends and I LOVE it that way. I wish I didn’t.

Being alone is my favorite way to be. I can’t move in any direction in life because of it. Fortunately my wife wants me to be a stay at home dad. She isn’t crippled like I am and she loves me anyway, thank goodness.