What do happy German noises sound like? Anytime I hear someone speaking German, it sounds like they’re angry and want domination.

“Oh, hi my friend! I’m so happy to see you!”

(Me not understanding German, and him not understanding English)

“Oh god, he means business! He’s so angry!”

“We are going to have such fun! I have some delightful games to play, and them we can drink this authentic German lagger!”

“You hear that??? He said German! He’s talking about world domination! He’s going to kill EVERYBODY!!!”

“Come here, friend! I want to give you a big ol’ hug, and embrace in our friendship!”

“HE’S SPREADING HIS ARMS TO SHOW HIS SIZE, AND MAKE HIMSELF BIGGER LIKE A BEAR!!! IT’S STARTING!!!”

“I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE SAYING, BUDDY, BUT I LOVE THE ENTHUSIASM!!!”

“AAAAHHHHH!!!”

“AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!”