Probing questions are bullshit.
Comment on is this the right way to establish boundaries with my nosy coworkers at the hospital?
Alsjemenou@lemy.nl 4 months ago
Sounds like a one sided arrangement that’s only good for you and not for the cohesion of the group. What’s the actual problem with connecting to/socialising with people?
I get that it’s annoying sometimes, and it’s fine to have limits. But you’re working in a place where other people are working, some people need socialising just like you need space. It’s give and take. You’re just asking for special treatment because you’re introverted?
Sorry but the excuse that it’s ‘just work’ is bullshit. You have responsibility you’re an adult, different people different needs, be accommodating to get accommodation.
PsychedSy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 months ago
z00s@lemmy.world 4 months ago
OP owes exactly nothing to his co-workers other than doing his job and being polite. If you think he does, then you’re the problem.
Maalus@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Yeah and being polite includes making small talk when people want to engage with you, not be a dude that says “don’t talk to me we just work together”. Work consists of 1/3rd of your life, even more for a nurse where doing a 24hr shift is normal. Not engaging with anyone during that time is being rude, even if you don’t like to talk to people. It’s like the minimum of a social contract.
z00s@lemmy.world 4 months ago
OP proposed many ways to let his co-workers know he doesn’t like chatting and none of them are what you quoted. In fact, he expressly created this thread to figure out how not to be rude to them
People are allowed to keep to themselves. Why does it bother you so much? Why are you so personally offended by this? I’ve never understood why extroverts feel that everyone must do what they want.
Maalus@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Stop assuming things about people after reading a single comment. I am not an extravert. The reality of it is - completely ignoring and not talking to your coworkers is weird. Even if you don’t like socializing to a fault, it doesn’t mean you behave like a weirdo when someone engages you in simple conversation. Also, since they are a nurse, they’ll be the same towards their patients? Where is the limit? Bedside manner is important and so is interacting with the people you work with.
dennis5wheel@programming.dev 4 months ago
thank you for defending me, but as you can see, being a minority is not easy: a neutrally worded and genuine question is met by animosity because people like maalus simply don’t understand or don’t want to understand. And he get’s upvoted. Even worse, he and his followers assume malevolence.
Just wanted you to know that I appreciate the feeling, but they are more and talk waaay more.
But still, I don’t know what to tell my delicate coworkers.
And make no mistake, this post will also be downvoted…
CouncilOfFriends@lemmy.world 4 months ago
I can’t agree with this more, thinking coworkers are owed your attention especially during breaks reeks of narcissism. My job doesn’t include or train me for providing therapy to old men who exclusively watch Fox News in the break room and debate which minority is to blame for the world scaring them. You can only try to inject reason into these conversations a few times before eating lunch in your car is the healthy option.
Alsjemenou@lemy.nl 4 months ago
Nobody is forcing anybody to do anything. And if you believe that people need to owe you something before you can engage with them, your obviously not being serious. Ignoring social interaction in a group is not a great way of going about life.
Especially not when you’re able and your only excuse is that you don’t want to. That’s how a 5 year old navigates life.
z00s@lemmy.world 4 months ago
The commenter I replied to wants to force OP to interact above and beyond what he wants to.
That’s how 5 year olds navigate life. Adults understand that everyone is allowed to make their own choices.