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Comment on The second matchup of the tournament

I picked man over bear because man probably won’t eat you. But if gorilla is a choice, that wins. Gorilla is friend as long as you keep your head low and he knows he’s the boss. Also don’t suprise him.

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Woozythebear@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
The bear also isn’t going to rape you and I would say the chances of the bear eating you and the man eating you are the same.

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- Thcdenton@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  You forgot to change accounts before posting again 🐻
  
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- GBU_28@lemm.ee ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Bear detected
  
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- Atin@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Just make sure you have marshmallows
  
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ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

because man probably won’t eat you.

that’s why I dumped my last boyfriend

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- KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  he ate you? Damn, that’s rough.
  
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  - SuddenDownpour@sh.itjust.works ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    No, no, because he didn’t eat out.
    
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    KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    sometimes blatantly misinterpreting statements is funny
    
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  - ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    it’s only rough when I don’t shave my hairy taco.
    
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    KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    in that case i should probably correct rough to tough, since we’re talking about cannibalism here.
    
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Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
cancels surprise birthday party for Koko Jr

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- Thcdenton@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  🥳
  
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  - Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    Oh shii… is torn limb from limb as your noisemaker and party hat digress from Koko Jr’s expectations
    
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Kase@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
To be clear, I’m not trying to get into a man v bear debate here. But, like, a man could still kill you, right? Is that better than being eaten? I mean, I guess it’s probably less likely. I’m no expert on bears or random forest men.

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- Thcdenton@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Im betting on the fact that humans have baked in altruism. We want to help each other. As a kid I got stuck in the forrest with my dirt bike and a gnarly looking guy helped me get home with his truck. It was a scary experience and it was a risk. I think most people are basically good. Men just have the strength to act on it when they are bad people.
  
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  - ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    you’ve never been a woman, have you?
    
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    Thcdenton@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    No I haven’t. But I have been sexually assaulted. I know from first hand experience how awful men can be. And I’d still pick a strange man over a bear to be stuck in the woods with. You can’t reason with a bear. You cant plead for your life. It will pin you to the ground and eat you alive ass-first. I’d rather be raped and shot or strangled if it came to that. But you do you.
    
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- daltotron@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  
  But, like, a man could still kill you, right? Is that better than being eaten?
  
  I mean generally being eaten entails entrails leaking out, whereas getting killed could entail any number of things. Neck snap, choked out, slit throat, whatever. I dunno if your average idiot man is gonna be as proficient of a killer as a bear, even if they happen to be a murderer or like, just evil, right, so, I dunno. Kind of a toss up. Me personally, I would rather not have my guts spilled out, ribcage crushed, spine snapped, bones gnawed on while I’m still conscious, slowly lose blood and lose consciousness over the course of 30 minutes to an hour. I mean I guess theoretically a man could do those things too, but I dunno many men that could. Maybe like, the mike tyson of 40 years ago?
  
  I guess the argument I’m making hinges on the idea that humans are generally bad at killing in a physiological sense, and their need to kind of, up themselves in the game means that they tend to get filtered into a bunch of more painless and efficient approaches relative to the kind of uncaring cruelty of nature more generally. But then I dunno, humans also have a capacity for needless cruelty and torture, so I’d also be betting my chances that I don’t get shafted and stuck with like, a super jacked serial killer that can torture me with their bare hands, which there’s probably only like 2 or 3 of in the world. Maybe more if you include government contracted ones.
  
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