that’s some great piece of advice in here
Comment on Anon has nerdy hobbies
Lets_Eat_Grandma@lemm.ee 1 month agoThere is no place, women do not want to be talked to anywhere but the bar or apps which ime have been bad places to find long-term companionship.
Come the fuck on. The rules have been the same from the dawn of time.
#1 Be Attractive
#2 Don’t be unattractive
You’ll hear shit on the internet all the time about how women don’t want to be approached, don’t want to be hit on, don’t want anyone to flirt with them… but it’s all bullshit because the person saying it is an INDIVIDUAL. It’s right for them but it isn’t right for all women. I promise, women date men all the time!
It doesn’t matter that they get all the upvotes in the world from all the white knights and other women who are sick of the attention. That’s fine. Don’t harass women who shut you down and you can freely ignore the loud voices on the internet.
Since forever in western society, Men have to generally try to make the first move - even if it’s just asking a woman out for coffee - and based on the response you either move on or keep trying. It’s literally that simple. It’s also mostly a numbers game… but the be attractive thing is no joke. Don’t be an asshole. Don’t be a slob. Learn how to cook and do chores and keep your place clean… if you don’t have a place, bust your ass until you get to a point where you can get one.
All the tropes where women say they don’t date anyone at xyz is bullshit beyond the individual level. If someone finds you attractive and they want to date you they are going to give positive body language and positive answers to the things that would escalate towards that goal if they really want you. If they don’t, they just don’t want you, try someone else.
If you’re getting angry about women not wanting you and it makes your blood boil and you think you deserve something… you are ignoring rule #1 and rule #2, quit being a fucking asshole.
Finally… why in the fuck you wouldn’t date someone at work is beyond me. People marry someone they met at work all the time.
saturno@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 month ago
I promise, women date men all the time!
You can’t prove that! Until I see evidence this is all conjecture! Hell for all I know all those supposed women who date those men met them in said bars or apps!
Lol kidding. I know, I have even dated a few myself, buuuut I did indeed meet them all in bars (or school.) I sorta was drinking way too much and spending way too much money though, and unfortunately covid happened, inflation went tits up, I couldn’t bar then because quarantine and I can’t really bar much now because my local grocer has decided all my money is his, besides the whole “drinking like 1 drink instead of 15+” thing, and I’ve kind of become disillusioned with that whole scene. The girl I was dating at the start of quarantine was even worse than me, like “a bottle of vodka a night” bad, and frankly I’d just like maybe something a little different, and even besides her, the four previous I also met at a bar, and they were also not much better off (though the last one was the worst by a mile the rest were just like “me then” not “me now.”)
Don’t be an asshole. Don’t be a slob. Learn how to cook and do chores and keep your place clean… if you don’t have a place, bust your ass until you get to a point where you can get one.
Only when I need to; I’m clean and shower I swear, I’m just a punk, the vest is just well seasoned; own my house (well…the bank does, for now, but whatever).
give positive body language
Oh did I mention I literally have a diagnosed “learning disability” that basically amounts to “this fucking moron misses a lot of social cues?” Lol 'cause that is kinda a thing.
No work because I like my job and don’t wish to cause any possible issues with it. Y’know, like if it doesn’t work out or whatever, I’d just like to avoid the possibility for awkwardness entirely.
I mean I’m not entirely ruling it out, shipping has fairly high turnover, so maybe we’ll hire a single person at some point and we vibe, and maybe she decides not to stick around, and I see if she wants to chill “now that she’s leaving and we can’t see each other here anymore,” but that’s a lot of “ifs” lol. I mean at the moment there’s just flat out no options at my work unless I want to try and cause a divorce lol.
I used to date at work sometimes back in my restaurant days, but that’s just what it is. I have considered picking up a little side waiting gig though just to try and meet someone single, then I can be the one who quits if it gets weird, and pick up some cash for the dates on the way. Working too much OT for that one right now though but I have it in my back pocket.
arefx@lemmy.ml 1 month ago
[deleted]ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 month ago
That would have line up with “dirty” but go off queen.
arefx@lemmy.ml 1 month ago
Great post tbh