Even worse they raised a kid with no will to fly the coop AND they rejected a intergrated multigenerational house hold.

Most cultures on earth and for most of history you lived with your family your entire life, or moved to another house hold. To start a new household was abnormal.

So you either need to raise your kid to the new standard to want to stand on their own and start their own household. Or you embrace the old and stay together and create a multigenerational household.

To do neither is objectively abuse.