Comment on How to deal with people who obtusely miss your point on Lemmy?

• Strider@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

  You’ve lost me. And while I provided fundamentals with source I do not comprehend what this short statement is meaning nor trying to achieve but personal ‘winning’ on the internet.

  As previously stated we have to manage our social resources tightly and this is where I exit.

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  • schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    You said, “your answer kind of proves the point to me.” I was asking what it was that I said and what point it proved.

    I was worried maybe such a brief question would be interpreted as hostile, but you had assured me the atypical people, of which you claimed to be, don’t think that way, that it is is merely an annoying trait of NTs.

    I’m starting to think that maybe you are over-interpreting autism into this context. Not that double-bind communication doesn’t exist (thank you for sharing that, btw), but on-line we do away with much of the bother of non-verbal communication (as well as the ability to easily skip over boring conversations and the ability to obliquely reference shit knowing SOMEONE is going to get it), so there is much more parity between NT and atypical people.

    I say this as someone with over 1k/comments Lemmy a month after having been here two months, and after having done all my “socializing” on line all my life–but it usually amounts to just this, having a series of one-off conversations with strangers, and it’s the best I can do, socially.

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    • Strider@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      Hey, thanks for continuing. I have to say, you’re possibly right with overthinking. That’s what we do. And hence, we often jump around to the point of getting lost in our own line of thinking - the latter being exactly what happened.

      I am now trying to read through the fragments and have a very hard time following myself. If we were sitting together it might be easier, doing this asynchronous is hard work. So thanks for putting up with that and your effort.

      Let me do some jumping around mobile and desktop and see of I can follow up.

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      • schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        No worries. I discovered the autism lemmy and think I have broad phenotype autism, so I’m always interested in learning more.

        I worked at a tech place and got along with everyone there. I thought it meant I was likable and it just different places are going to have different vibes, but someone pointed out tech people tend towards autism, so maybe all that was happening was that I find myself with a group of people who naturally shared my communication style… and that, basically still, I’m unlikable.

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  • mirshafie@europe.pub ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    You made a weird connection to autism that was unrelated to the post. You were asked to clarify the connection, and gave the example that “neurotypicals” rely on “unclear” communication. The connection is still ambiguous, you did not provide evidence, and now you’re being an asshole.

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    • Strider@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      Thanks (honestly) for clearing that up.

      See - that’s the issue. There is this inherent obvious connection on the op topic that you can’t see. And that’s fine, you’re NT. However I am not, hence you’re saying I am an asshole for not elaborating a point you can not understand. It’s literally beyond NT understanding.

      As is many understanding of yours to ND. And when trying to go into this, I, or rather, we are the assholes. So of course we resign. There is this gap in understanding that I even linked and it’s still not enough.

      So, there you go. I am sure it will not or never be enough. It’s just that on the opposite side you as a standin for NT are behaving like assholes, but both sides are literally incapable of getting some points across.

      As said, still thanks for your answer. Be kind to people, you might not understand them. (unrelated to me)

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      • mirshafie@europe.pub ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        If there is an obvious connection, it should be simple enough to explain it. If the assumption is that misunderstandings happen due to variances in brain wiring, I think that’s a sidenote rather than the generic explanation fot the phenomenon OP described. What OP tried to say is that misunderstandings happen due to biases - and we all have biases - and they wanted to shut down misunderdtandings politely before it derails the thread.

        The issue I’m taking is that you’re claiming something and it’s unclear what, saying that whatever it is should rrmain mysterious because of differences in brain wiring, because you’re autistic. Meanwhile, OP is autistic and so am I. We’re all fucking autistic. The irony is that this is derailing the thread.

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