Comment on How to move a sofa
wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 1 week agoI do have trouble integrating into communities, that’s the whole point. That people like me experience erasure. Even now, as I point out that people like me exist, most replies I’m getting have been combative in trying to double down on that erasure.
Like, can we not just acknowledge that there are people who slip through the cracks of society and as a result face challenges that most people never even have to think about or consider? Things that most people view as so easy and simple, that suddenly aren’t so easy and simple when you have no friends or community.
But no, people don’t like that reminder, so they’re hostile towards it, which only reinforces the marginalization and erasure of people like me…
1rre@discuss.tchncs.de 1 week ago
I think it’s harsh on to call it erasure, but completely understand that in effect it’s the same thing, because to me it seems people are hostile because what you’re saying doesn’t match their lived experiences, and so they’re saying “that’s not how it is” because they believe that you’re pre-judging situations based on how you think people will react to neurodivergent people, when that’s not the case at all. I like to think it comes from a place of good intentions, but yeah in reality it’s no different to saying “just cheer up” to a depressed person, when it’s really not that easy or how it works. The most important thing is that as irritating as it is, harboring resentment over this kind of thing helps nobody, and the best thing you can do is accept that they’re trying (badly) to help, and that they just don’t fully understand what the issue is.
wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 1 week ago
Maybe it’s not erasure, just passively enforcing the invisibility that people on the margins of society already have to deal with, and then being actively hostile towards anyone who brings it up, because it conflicts with most people’s worldview that those invisible, marginalized people don’t actually exist or have to cope with these systemic problems. I guess that’s different from erasure, somehow.
I’m not pre-judging situations based on assumptions, I’m sharing my lived experience as a neurodivergent person who’s always struggled to fit in and find acceptance. And if the hostility I’ve received in these comments is any indicator, then I have a good fucking point.
It’s the normies who are pre-judging the situation based on what they view as “normal” and their disbelief that other people could exist outside of their worldview and need to cope every day with problems that “normal” people don’t experience and are blind to. It’s like a white person who believes racism doesn’t exist. Neurotypicals believing ableism doesn’t exist. It’s the same fucking shit.