Comment on Pride month
Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 1 week agoOK, if you are technically unable to do the act. Which now is lightyears away from my point 😁
Comment on Pride month
Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 1 week agoOK, if you are technically unable to do the act. Which now is lightyears away from my point 😁
davidagain@lemmy.world 1 week ago
You’re deliberately misinterpreting me and insulting me at the same time. There’s no need for that.
You said
And that’s simply not true for most of us.
You characterised love and affection as hard to find, but I get love of various sorts readily from my wife, children and other family, and a great deal of affection from friends and some colleagues. You characterised sex as easy to find, stating I could get it anywhere and any time with anyone, and you argued with people who disagree, but the truth is that I can get sex only in my bedroom, only with my wife, only at night, and only when she is in the mood for it, and anything else is pure fiction, for me. Maybe not for you, but definitely for me.
That fact that you even think to assert that love and affection are hard to find and sex is easy to find is why we live very, very, very different lives. I’m not asking to swap, but we are NOT the same.
Maybe you mean something different than you’re saying, but of you want to get your point across to us ordinary folk for whom a sex life as busy as our libido was a teenage fantasy that never turned up, you’d better start rephrasing and explaining rather than just claiming “technical” truth.
It’s “technically” true that you can get affection anywhere. Yesterday I gave a homeless guy a lift from his begging pitch outside the bus station to his tent and bought him and his girlfriend a pizza hut on the way, and he cried and hugged me. Today I met up with a bunch of friends and got about four hugs, which is totally normal for that bunch. Most people wouldn’t call it love, but it’s heaps of affection.
We live very different lives for you to claim what you claim.
Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 1 week ago
I guess you deliberately want to misunderstand me. And I don’t even get why.
Love is something rare, where two souls need find each other.
Sex, I could go to the next brothel and have it 10 times a day. Or go on tinder and let golddiggers have it. If you’re a decently attractive woman, you’ll get it for free on tinder in 5 minutes. Or in the next bar or wherever. I can also walk around asking anyone until I’m lucky.
So that’s a simple COULD. Love you cannot simply get.
Maybe my point was badly phrased, I dunno. But insulting you surely wasn’t my goal.
davidagain@lemmy.world 1 week ago
Brothels are illegal in my country.
The vast majority of people are absolutely nowhere near rich enough to attract golddiggers.
I don’t know what proportion of women you believe are decently attractive, but surely you accept it isn’t 100%. Also roughly 49% of us are male, and this absolutely and unequivocally is not the experience of even decently attractive men.
This would get me slapped and possibly arrested for sexual harassment. It would definitely, definitely, definitely not work. You have to either be an unusually attractive man or alternatively be seeking sex from men for this to have any chance whatsoever of success.
I keep telling you that your experience is far from typical, and I keep telling you that we live completely different lives. You are confident that you could easily get sex if you wanted it, whenever or wherever you wanted it. I promise you 100% that I am right that your experience is NOT universal. You live in a magical world of sex availability. By contrast I live in a blessed world of readily available affection from my friends (who I chose), surrounded by family that love me, but where sex is available with frequency lower than my preference and with zero realistic chance of me getting it elsewhere.
WE ARE NOT THE SAME. Accept it please, and stop telling me I’m wrong about what my own lived experience is like. You are WRONG.
I don’t want to deliberately misunderstand you, I want you to hear me. Your experience of readily available sex whenever, wherever, whoever, is far from universal.
Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 1 week ago
Wow, in what horrible dark age country do you live? This is the oldest trade on earth, and those are incredibly helpful and needed in a society.
You really don’t get it. It has nothing to do with my life, my experiences or whatever. It’s just the simple logic that getting just sex is ultimately easier than getting love. It might be harder (no pun intended) depending on your laws, your own morals or your net-worth, but still way easier to find someone that loves you.
The external factors aren’t important. You might be ugly and poor and whatever, which would make tinder (or whatever people use nowadays) impossible. But even more difficult would finding love be. Of course one shouldn’t rape, obviously in a civilized society, but one still TECHNICALLY could. But there’s nothing in the world you could do to make someone love you, no matter how willing you’re to do anything.
Again, this is absolutely not about personal experience, and has nothing to do with that.
That is not really the same kind of love you’re talking about. Important too, but totally different. I, for example, have no family (except my wife) and there’s nothing I could do to get one.