Hello my name is Doug, I’m 40+ years old and I’m a fucking idiot.

I mean I guess part of me knew, I have been to Subway and watched them slice the fucking bread. But when I see baguettes at the store I think “hm, just like Olive Garden, I can make tiny baguette slices!” I don’t think “yeah time to make some killer sandwiches.”

…I’m going to blame my autism for this one. It probably isn’t true, but I’m gonna blame it anyway.