Fellow white transfem here, I definitely agree that there’s a time and place for unaffected people to advocate for a minority.

That said, if I’m being charitable to OP, there are absolutely times when minorities get talked over in ways that really suck.

I once attended a listening circle/support group that came together as a piece of transphobic legislation was likely to pass in my state. I went, expecting a good mix of trans folks and allies, and that we’d be coming together to vent our frustrations and figure out a way forward.

But what I got instead was a room full of mostly cis people, talking over the trans people in the room, and being all sad and morose, like the bill in question was already a foregone conclusion. Like the trans people in the room were a lost cause to mourn, rather than worth helping.

And that… Sucked! That bill didn’t pass, but it wasn’t because any of the cis people in that room did anything to help.